Should D-Fens be given a medal for "taking out the trash"
Look, I get it; Family Court is utterly screwed up and the wife is usually viewed as some innocent while the fault is "the man" for whatever stupid reasons...
But it is surprising that people actually go so far as to try to exonerate D-FENS for his crimes.
He goes to the Korean's corner shop, asking for change; and the guy is a dick and refuses unless he buys something. He tries to buy something and the guy charges him so much that he cannot get a phonecall from the "change".
Option 1) Give the guy $2, ask for 4 quarters and 15 cents
Option 2) Leave the store, taking your money to a place that actually wants it
Option 3) Speak agitatedly at the store owner until said owner feels you are a threat and escalates to violence.
Does option 3 happen to people now and again? Yes... but only when he got so out of control that people feared for their life did it actually "resolve" the conflict.
What the film does is not give him "justifiable triggers", but to highlight how we self rationalize that these triggers are "justifiable" and that he was just having a bad day. Most of you focus on the extremely visible physical violence while ignoring the much more subtle and witty verbal aggression.
Take the scene with the gang members; they're cornering him stating how how he "cannot read" the meaningless graffiti in the same way that a white man would come out saying "Can't you read, the sign says no trespassing, Mexican scum!" and his response was "Well, I'm sorry, but I still cannot read your language, why don't you learn mine." He threw their racism to white people back at them with the racism they've come to expect from white people.
People may cheer about him talking back about not getting breakfast, or telling a panhandler to shove off, even complaining about how roads get closed for seemingly no reason... but each and every one of these are AGGRESSIVE actions that prelude the violence; not cause it really.
When he meets the aggressive golfer, he could very well move out of his swing, instead he instigates the golfer (who is already a dick) into taking a potshot at him.
Option 1) He could start heading to the other side of the course, out of the golfer's way.
Option 2) He could speak to the less aggressive friend about anything other than his friend's behavior.
Option 3) He could insult golf, insult the golfer, and tick the guy who paid money to be there off while he is clearly trespassing (it seems the gang members were right, he cannot read!)... then pull out a shotgun to show them who is the REAL man!
It is interesting to note is that throughout the film, he clearly demonstrates a controlling personality. The problem is that while this cold, calculating, always in control character seems to be the most masculine role model you can create; it is actually a hint at him being a sociopath. Do understand that sociopath has some extremely incorrect slang attached to it, but the principle characteristic of lacking, or having diminished, empathy for others is quite key here.
He is holding a shotgun and the hand of one of the father's daughters; the father is doing his best to protect his family, the wife is terrified... and he says "Oh, I hurt you, I didn't mean to hurt you" as if the girl would care about a little bit of blood when a guy with a huge gun is standing next to her and her father with everyone looking terrified.
In fact, if you watch closely, he clearly has to THINK about why someone would be scared of him; and then he says "oh, I won't hurt your family, I have a family of my own! Why don't you believe me!"