1) Whenever you need to pass someone on a race track, all you need to do is shift gears..even if you're doing 175 m.p.h. and are already in 4th gear.
Add some more and lets keep it going.
This shark. Swallow you whole. Little shaking. Little tenderizing, down you go. Quint "Jaws"
2 You can make out with a hot doctor by telling her she was ignoring you.
3. Racing strategy is planned ahead with sugar packets.
4. Policewomen is really prostitutes in disguise.
5. 2 injured race cars drivers will race in anything, including wheelchairs.
If you are doing bad in a race you should hit the pace car
share7. Sprint car drivers transition to stock car driving no problem. Just drive the way Robert Duvall asks you to drive, then You'll win all races.
8. Hitting someone in the bumper is only considered rubbing in Nascar
9. Sprint car drivers don't know anything about cars, they just drive it.
10. When you get older you dream of coming back to the country farm.
11. Let Tom Cruise drive, cuz he won't make a fool out of you
12. Tom now appears in two movies with the title "thunder"
13. ESPN coverage is excellent, you'd be surprised how much you can pick up on Nascar racing.
14. Rowdy refers to his car as his "bitch".
15. If it had been anything but a damn woman doctor, he'd have been back on the track weeks ago.
16. Hospitals make you take off your shoes and close your eyes.
17. You can fix somebody's head with a baseball bat, but only if you hit a pool table with it first.
18. Any surgery on Rowdy's brain is bound to be minor.
19. Getting "real ornery" with someone is code for touching their genitalia.
20. In NASCAR, it's perfectly ok to broadcast to your entire pit crew that you're going to put somebody into the wall.
21. Two race teams means there's one too many roosters in the henhouse.
"No towels, need sleepy"--Tommy Boy
Dude I was laughing so hard when I read that
share22. The Japanese aren't sure they want to import lettuce
23. "They have numbers on the cars"
24. Robert Duvall is allowed to modify his car's profile to "shape it like a bullet", while the rest of the cars in the field must conform to NASCAR's templates.
25. After winning your first race, you no longer care about the rest of the season. All you care about it the first race of the next season.
26. If you're from California, you aren't really anything.
27. When actors in Tom Cruise movies break character and refer to him as "Tom" on screen instead of by his character's name, nobody thinks it's worth re-shooting the scene or dubbing over the gaffe. After all, it's only a Tom Cruise movie.
28. A car built in a barn by two guys is just as competitive as one built in a professional race shop full of engineers.
29. All Southerners drink moonshine.
30. Cole Trickle is such a good driver, he can compete on every track in the NASCAR circuit in a single car instead of having specialized cars for short tracks, superspeedways, and road courses.
31. A 23 year old actress is entirely convincing as not only a full fledged doctor, but a brain specialist to boot!
I don't have an opinion. The word "opinion" implies the possibility I'm wrong.
32. Drivers can leave the pits at full throttle after the race is over, commit attempted manslaughter by hitting another driver broadside at full throttle and the only people who get upset are the car's owner and the driver who got hit.
share33. Cary Elwes makes a very convincing NASCAR driver with an even more-convincing southern US persona
share34. You can take the green flag on a restart at full tilt, pass the entire field and challenge for the lead without NASCAR officals even blinking an eye.
shareThey stole that idea from Marty Robbins.
I don't have an opinion. The word "opinion" implies the possibility I'm wrong.
35. Even though they blow and brush every inch of a NASCAR track somehow a race car (and your face) gets dirtier than your street car after a rainstorm
36. Cole Trickle's sidekick later becomes Will Ferrel's sidekick in Ricky Bobby
37. Every time you have a big race there will be a big crash in turn 4 that creates enough smoke so that you can't see through it and you have to ignore your spotters and trust that nobody in in your way.
38. After you have cleared the big crash everything is ok and you can now win the race.
39. Adding Top Gun music to a NASCAR race movie makes you want to race NASCAR instead of joining the Air Force
40. Anyone can ride a motorcycle right onto pit row while race cars are being qualified.
41. When you're about to start a race, you're biggest rival is going to be right next to you so you can look him in the eyes just before the race.
42. If you're throttle is stuck just get bump but be aware, your gearbox's gonna be broken...
43. Bumping a parked taxi causes its driver to frantically avoid you at any cost.
44. The editors may have been too high, drunk, or incompetent to notice the faulty overdub when Tom's character can relay to his crew chief that his "accelerator is stuck" without moving his mouth.
45. No penalty is ever given to drivers throughout the season who repeatedly slam each other into the wall or tap each other on the corner panel, causing multi-car accidents with obvious intent for personal gain.
46. Breadwinners of race teams must know that picking a cocky driver who can chew gum while driving enables him to get away with winning by any means.
47. Post-op drugs make you extra horny for hot Australian feather-weights.
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59. You can spin your car several times in the middle of a race, and despite the fact that you came to a dead stop and everyone else is going 200mph, you can end up back in 2nd place in a matter of moments...
60. The owner of a NASCAR race team would laugh hysterically when his driver voluntarily takes himself out of a race to confront his pit crew who is eating ice cream in the middle of a race....while laughing hysterically themselves....
61. A driver and crew chief can have enough time to have an extensive conversation about driving through the smoke from a wreck, but that's apparently not enough time to simply slow down enough, or stop completely in order to safely avoid the wreck....
"No towels, need sleepy"--Tommy Boy
62. When there is a multi-car pileup, no yellow flags will be waved and drivers will not slow down. Instead it's a better idea to floor it through the smoke and wreckage and hope for the best.
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Re: #40... There is actually a tunnel under turn 3 at Charlotte. Duvall even mentions "tunnel turn."
If you smell something burning...it's probably you!!!
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63. Cole has been driving A.S.A. but only knows about stock car racing from watching ESPN.
64. Harry doesn't mind spreading a little fertilizer now and then because there's worse things.
65. Eagle Rock, CA is not up around Wilkesboro.
66. There's nothing stock about a stock car.
67. When it comes to the car, take Harry's word.
68. Sprint car drivers never say "10-4" over the radio.
69. It's damn nice to meet Buck.
70. Aldo Bennedetti will flip you off for bumping and passing him but will run into your rear bumper hard enough to knock his hood off and cause a huge pileup.
If you smell something burning...it's probably you!!!
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lighten up, Francis. they're talking about the movie, not NASCAR. what they've pointed out about the movie is true, you should watch it sometime.
I've got a strong urge to fly,
but I've got nowhere to fly to.
71. It's damn nice to meet Cole too!
72. If the toe goes up, your in trouble.
73. Nobody in the Burns' family goes to the doctor unless their dying.
74. If you get a driver to a funeral before he's actually dead, you've made
history.
75. The crew chief knows where the scratches on your helmet are.
76) If you win a race a hot babe dressed up like a patrol officer will slam you up against the truck and grope you
77) Buddy was the fastest talking unconscious son of a bitch you ever heard
78) Harry never taught his coon dog a damn thing
79) Apparently its unheard of for a team owner to have more than one driver?
80) Race your ass!
81) Nicole Kidman has the nicest ass I have ever seen on a doctor
82) I don't expect to see much of Cole Trickle, except in my rearview mirror
83) If your old man uses your name while commiting fraud you will lose your ride
Are you watching closely?
84) You can DRIVE through it!
85) He's goin high.... He's goin LOW!!!!
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86. NASCAR drivers, crew members, car owners, and even its president love using 4 letter words.
87. Candy asses will never get back on the race track.
88. Any time you get spun out onto the apron at Daytona, there is a 1 out of 3 chance that you are out of the race.
89. Cole's name's not Andretti or Unser.
90. If you're not buried in horse manure, you're looking pretty good.
91. Tires is what wins a race.
92. 9000RPMs on the tach is BAD!!!
93. New tires, as opposed to scuffs, just makes the car feel all wrong.
94. Doctors think race car drivers are infantile egomaniacs.
If you smell something burning...it's probably you!!!
That Russ knows Cole
He always goes to the outside
oh wait...
95: That TIRES....are what wins a race.
96: That when Wheeler knocks you into Gant, Gant will spin out.
97: That Harry knows all about you and Rowdy Burns.
98: That you better be at max speed when the green flag drops.
" The Earth was blue, but there was no God "---- Yuri Gagarin
99. American brian specialists sometimes inexplicably have an Aussie accent.
share100. Monkeys are notorious for *beep* footballs!
101. Bad accidents will shake up both Maverick and Cole Trickle.
102. "Talk to me, Goose." = "Talk to me, Harry."
103. The driver's girlfriend gets to hang out with the crew chief the whole race. He has nothing else to worry about so he can spend the whole race answering her questions.
104. Wear a white jump suit to a race so when the pit crew who've been handling grease and dirt for the last 4 hours pick you up for the driver you'll look really good.
105 sponsors give you just enough money to put their name on the car
share#106 Harry doesn't want to spoil buck.
#107 Nascar doesn't want you to eat ice cream cones while driving, you have enough trouble going round the track as it is.
#108 Don't carbon monoxide Harry's ass.
#109 That your rival and former boss will give you a competitive engine to win the Daytona 500 with. (And push start it when you just need the "high gear")
#110 When the rear ends loose, car's fast.
#111 Harry has the best coon dog we have ever seen.
#112 Cole doesnt know much about cars
#113 Darryl Waltrip doesnt burn up his tires.
#114 if you are a good guy in a race car you get Nicole Kidman. If you are a bad guy in a race car, you get Butch!
share115. If Nicole Kidamn throws you against the wall to make out with you somehow you magically grow to her matching height.
116. Rowdy has never been seasick a day in his life
117. Rowdy and his wife just want to live in a place where no one has ever lived but them.
118. When Rowdy faints cole throws up.
119. The wall and flagstand at Darlington for some reason have the Daytona logo on them. Then again for some reason every track Cole races on seem to look exactly like Daytona.
120. Cole doesnt know why engines blow because hes not a mechanic.
121. If NASCAR doesnt call it low down *beep* ass racing then Tim better.
122. Multi million dollar NASCAR drivers do their own laundry at the local dirt track.
Fanboys just make me laugh at thier sad pitifulness
123. Cole was by far the best conditioned athlete that ever raced in NASCAR. Normally drivers are fatigued after a race. However after Cole drove a 500 mile race at Daytona, he was able to run down pit road without showing any sign of fatigue.
124. Rowdy apparently had some adequate medical skills. Remember he said that nobody in his family goes to the doctor unless they're dying. Well when his children were born he must not have taken his wife to the hospital. He must have delivered his babies by himself at home.
125. Harry can build a driver like he can build a car.
126. Tim is one helluva salesman to make sure there won't be an investigation out on Harry.
127. Tim paid twenty five hundred dollars to use the track for a day.
128. Cole doesn't need to appreciate Harry's job to do his.
129. Rowdy would rather let Cole rent his own car than be in the same car when going to dinner.
130. Tim had sponsors in the stands where he was huggin' and holdin' hands and kissin'em in the ears and prayin' for a good showin' but they end up lookin like a monkey focking a football out there.
131. Cole is an idiot; he doesn't have the vocabulary of stock car racing terms.
132. Always change Cole's tires after the loss of a cheapshot race because he has unfinished business with anyone like Russ Wheeler.
133. Never hold a bad opinion about Cole because it scares him.
134. Harry has given Cole a life.
135. No other actor says HORSE SHIET better than Robert Duvall.