Things I Learned from Uninvited

1. Using "extreme caution" means to stand there going "Nooo!" until you die.

2. People are filled with several liters of chocolate syrup.

3. Dodge pickups change into Fords when driving off of cliffs.

4. Car windows shatter approximately 10 times.

5. Losing feeling in your arm does not affect your performance in bed.

6. The Battle Hymn of the Republic is a romantic song.

7. Mutant cats hate alcoholic beverages.

8. Dying from cat venom looks and sounds suspiciously like passing a kidney stone.

9. When bitten by a highly venomous creature, your best course of action is to jump into the ocean.

10. When committing suicide, it's advisable to drag your girlfriend who is attempting to stop you overboard with you.

I mean, really, how many times will you look under Jabba's manboobs?