Comedian Movie


after seeing this film, I've been inspired to write a film about a comedian, and I was wonderin if I could get some opinions on it.

ok, my film is about a young man named Andy Williams (i made up the name based on my two favorite comedians of all time: Robin Williams and Andy Kaufman) who wants to be a comedian in the worst way. the film starts out with him as a 12 year old boy watching stand-up comedy of his favorite comedian George Carlin, with his father. Andy hen tells his dad that he wants to be just like that guy. his father replies by saying "well, if you et your mind to it, you could it." Andy then says to himself "I will." we now see Andy at school, where he doesn't fit in that well, so he tries to makeup for itby trying to be funny. so what he does during school at this point is say random stuff that he thinks is funny when they're not. this causes kids to make fun of him, tell him he's "retarted" and that he's not funny and never will be. this saddens Andy very much. we now flash foward to the future where Andy is a young man around maybe 20 or 21 he's at a comedy club where we see him on stage oing an act and once agin he's failing badly on stage, the crowd is throwing stuff at him, he's trying to reedem himslef, but is having no success, so finally the curtin shuts down on him and the crowd cheers. Andy is furious and he goes home, where he still lives with his parents. His mother is being sympthoic about his failing comedic dreams, but his father is not. his father tells him to give up, it's never gonna happen, etc. At this point Andy yells at his father telling him "you'll see." and with that h storms back into his room, where he'swatching more of his favorite comic, George Carlin. as he's watching he all of the sudden gets an idea for his stand-up, suddenly he's at his desk writing an act, he knows will be brilliant. so, the next day he goes back to the comedy club, and talks the club manager to lt go on stage that night, the club manager is sekeptical aboutt, but lets him do it anyway. so, the later that night he tires to go on stage, but as the crowd sees him they start to boo really loudly, Andy then tries to do his act, but evrytime he tries to speak the crowd gets more angry, and throw suff at hm once again, this scene is alot worse then what to happened the day before. so, he finally leaves the stage, we now see him backstage where he sits down, he's holding his face, sobbing. suddenly, a pretty young woman who's around Andy's age, walks into the room and tries to comfort him, but nothing seems to help, so she tells him about when she first started n the comedy business, she hd the same thing happen to her, and that it happend to every comedian. Andy starts to feel better about this. the young now wants to see hi act, so Andy shows her, she laughs and says it's brilliant. Andy admits that it is but no one wants to hear it. so, the young lady has an idea. we now see the last act of the night finishing, just when the audience thought the show was over, the young lady comes out andtries to convince the audience to give Andy one more chance, the audience disapproves as does the cub manager. finaly, she convinces them. Andy comes out to one person clapping. Andy starts his act, but isn't getting any laughter. he looks toward the young lady who urges him to keep going, Andy tires, but still nothing. Andy then is about to leave the stage, but someone from the audience yells out a insult at Andy, so Andy fire back an insult of his own, which the audience finds funny. Andy seems confused, then someone else in the audience yells "got anymore insults?" Andy now feels confident, and starts sayin more and more insults and other jokes. the crowd loves it, as does the young lady and the club manager. we now see both Andy and the young lady backstage, celebrating a good night, the young lady then asks Andy if he wants to go for dinner with her, Andy agrees. we now see them in a resturant disscussing comedy and Andy says how his dream is have an HBO comedy special one day. we now see them in going to the young lady's apartment, they walk into the apartment, they talk more, and then they start to get closer to each other, and then they kiss, they continue kissing, until the scene fades out. we now see Andy come home, where it's late at night, he walks into the house, we see his parents were woried sick about him, but Andy explains what happened, and his parents are proud of him. the next day we see both Andy and the young at lunch where they discuss Andy's act and how it could be improved. We now see Andy risng through the ranks of comedians where see several newspaper headlines, people laughing, etc. we even see him and the young lady get married. at this point he's a well known comedian and hes now on a talk show, where he announces that his HBO comedy special will aring within the next few months, and right he's on a comedy tour, to promote the event. we see him on a tour bus with fellow comedians and his wife. they're now on the road, trying to promote Andy's HBO comedy special. they make a rest stop, we see Andy go into a rest room, in the rest room we see him doing some kind of illegal drugs. we now see him a a comedy club doing a stand up and people are laughing. after his act is done we see Andy go into the club restroom adn do some of his illegal drugs, as he walks out of the stall, he sees a cop, who startles Andy, which cause Andy to drop drugs on the floor, the cop sees the drugs and immedatily arrests him. people, especially hi are both shocked and scared to see Andy being put in the cop car andbeing drivin. his wife has tears running down her eyes, and she's yelling at Andy, "Why?! Why?! Why?!" we then see Andy get thrown behind bars. a few minutes later we see his wife come for a visit, his wife is a mess, she doesn't know what to say to him, she's mad. Andy is trying to redeem himself, but nothing is helping, so she leaves. Andy goes back to his cell, he slowly lays back in his cell bed, ad starts to cry. by the next day, everyone knows that one of the biggest comedians in the world is a drug addict and was found guilty and must serve 18 months in jail, and his HBO comedy special has ben cancelled. we see his parenst at thgeir home very upset as to what they've found out. we are getting close to 18 months, Andy looks like a mess sitting in his cell, when his wife comes to visit him, in this heart renching scene, they have a heated arument, until finlly they embrace each other, and hi wife agrees to help him get back on track. we see Andy come out of the jail, with reporters surrounding the place asking questions and taking pcitures, from there, Andy sends a public apology out to the world, the crowd cheers in approval. We now see Andy arrive home, where all thesudden the phone rings, it's HBO. they want to go for the comedy special one more time. Andy agrees, with excitment, he and his wife celebrate. next, we see a short music montage of Andy getting things back together and getting his special setup. after the montage, we see Andy in his bed late at night, he's awake, and we his thoughts from throughout his life, from childhood to now, he all of the sudden feels very nervous about his special, he wakes up his wife, and she comforts him. we now see the arena where Andy will be performing, nd we see a crowd of thousands chanting his name. Andy is backstage both nervous and excited, he's with his wife and parents, who wish him good luck and they go to their seats. Andy then takes a deep breath, his name is announced, and goes out on stage to a crowd going crazy for him. we then see Andy do his routine, trough a music montage, after the special ends he says "thanks you very much everyone, good night!" the crowd cheers, and Andy sees his wife and parents in he audience cheering and sending their love to him. Andy is still on the stage, where he has a look of relief and satisfaction, the look n his face is saying "I did it!" we see a slow motion shot of him exiting the stage. we now see him backstae, where a backstage guy tells him, "there's someone that wants to see you, he's in you dressing room." Andy, a little confused opens the door, and says "can I help you with something?" we see a gary haired man sitting in a chair with his back faced to Andy, the man simply says "you did a great job out there kid." Andy then realizes and says "George Carlin?" and man then says "that's right, kid, your favorite comedian" the man then turns around to revelve himslef as George Carlin. Carlin then says "after this performance, you will go down in history as a comedic legend." Andy then has tears of joy in his eyes, finally, the two embrace each other and the picture fades out. The End!

so what do you think of my story, please let me know, if it needs improvement. also, keep in mind that I'm only 17, so I'm not exactly a writing genius. Thank You!

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I wrote a similar story for my English story writing last year - very similar (I'm 14 now). It's a brilliant story you've written though man, it's truly great! If I may make suggestions (you probably wont listen to a minor but anyway...)...oh quickly, Love the idea for the name!

in my story I wrote for English class, it had a similar outcome (with the insulting the crowd and getting laughs from that instead of the actual jokes and the woman at the end) which seems to be a bit predictable.

I can't really think of anything else to say 'cept good luck man! you're going to be successful if you keep at this!

Liv.

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thanks for the advice, it always great to hear other suggestions, thanks again.

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There was already a famous singer named Andy Williams.

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You have written the greatest screenplay of all time. It just won three Academy Awards.

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Anyone else look at the post and decided not to read it because it was just one giant block of text???
Break it up man. Use the ENTER key and make some paragraphs. For one so fresh from High School, you'd think that would be a given....

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