A Neverending Story finished in 1 hour 47 minutes-REVIEW

SPOILERS FOR THIS 200 YEAR OLD KIDS FILM

-so i like 80s films
-and i like fantasy films
-so would i like this fucking film?
-well this film is about some shitty little kid called sebastian
-and this little shit is moping about
-cos his mother only went and fucking died didnt she
-and his father is some corporate hoe
-who thinks blending a single raw egg with orange juice
-is an acceptable form of breakfast
-so sebastian runs about getting bullied
-by these punk kids
-and instead of fighting back
-and instead of dealing with his emotional issues in a productive and healthy manner
-he starts reading fantasy books
-(this kid could be me tbh)
-and the book he reads
-is called there and back again; the never ending story
-which is about a kingdom
-thats dying from literally nothing
-and in order to save their kingdom and their princess
-the elder enlists the help of a child
-cos as we all know
-in fantasy when a dangerous and nigh impossible journey needs doing
-you employ the first kid you see
-or as is known in our world as the Nike employment policy
-which would also explain why all these fantasy heros
-also come from 3rd world shit holes
-well you can't expect the Prince of the misty mountains to do fuck all can you
-with his numerous armies and relevant experience in war and limitless funds
-nah you get some shitty little kid with no parents
-no parents no problems
-so anyway overall this film is pretty damn good
-as the music is very good and sounds like nobuo uematsu's final fantasy songs
-and you see all the other inspirations in the film that led to aspects of zelda and final fantasy
-(yes i am including the exploitation of young orphans)
-so yeah this film is campy and fun and has great music
-especially the main song
-also the innocence and lack of cynicism mixed with genuine quality
-and high productions values for its time
-is very pleasing to watch
-even the kids give good performances
-dont get me started on the horse scene
-...which is a line ive said before in reference to another type of exploitation film
8.5/10 (would be 8/10 is not for the main song)