Best line ever ?

"Adjusting your breasts. You fainted and they shifted out of whack... There."

Or the simple over the top "Zip!" when he pulls that thug's fly down.

You know why the chicken crossed the road? Because the road crossed the chicken.

Her lips were warm, and my arm wasn't the only thing throbbing...our hearts were,too. I was gonna kiss every lip on her face...

I think I'm an optimist, because I see her c-cups as half full.

-Dr. Gregory House

Juliet: "You're a very smart man."

Rigby: "So was Abraham Lincoln. Look what happened to him. Smart can get you killed."


"And you wanna be my latex salesman?"

I saw this at the time and though I enjoyed it, I'd forgotten much of it. I still enjoyed it, but that line and maybe four others struck me as just crass.

The scene where Steve Martin (Reardon) brings Edward Arnold (Mr. Altfeld) a puppy as a peace offering--

Mr. Altfeld: Don't call me or my daughter again! Don't try to see her! Don't write her and don't phone her!

Reardon: Can I use her underwear to make soup?

That line just made me do a spit-take!




I asked the doctor to take your picture so I can look at you from inside as well.

-"but it's all soft and steamy"
-"PICK IT UP!"
-(to the secretaries)"Here's a puppy for you, and here's something for you too"


-"the guards are getting suspicious, say something like 'no no ma, look see?'
-"No no ma, look see?"


-"That will give me four hours to wash and press your pajamas!"

f'n hilarious!

Did you tell LUKE..? Is THAT who you could tell??

Don't forget when they parody the famous 'whistle' line from To Have and Have Not.