MovieChat Forums > Polyester (1981) Discussion > What would you say is the funniest line ...

What would you say is the funniest line in the movie?


Mine "All the neighborhood women spit at me whenever I go to the shopping mall!"

Any others?

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"You bought this house with the profits of porno"

or

"My clothes are the finest polyester, and I didn't pay for them"

I love this movie!

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"God, I wish I lived in Connecticut!"- cuddles.


We came to smash everything and ruin your life. God sent us.

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"Oh Cuddles I am an Alcoholic!"

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"You're really gouche, madam. A reg'lar couchant, and that means PIG!"

And

"Maybe next time you won't be so selfish and ignore little children on holidays!!!"

Sorry if I butchered those. I haven't seen the movie in about two years, but those lines always stick with me. As funny as Francine and the rest of the cast is, the one who really steals the show is Cuddles! She's got to be the funniest film character of the last twenty-five years.

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"I never wanted to use macrame to kill..."

Actually, anything Lulu says is my favorite!

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my favorite line in the movie is spoken by francines mother. "don't you know that it is bad luck to let retarded people into your home?" my other favorite is when francine is on the toilet and her mother busts in and shreiks " i don't know why you bother, you've always retained your fluids!" you have to hear her say them, my typing doesn't do them justice!!!

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it is hard to think of an absolute favorite because too many of them are completely hysterical. i also like when her mother and todd are celebrating at his movie theatre and her mother yells "freeeeeebasing!!" as they are,well, freebasing.

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Francine: Everything smells MUCH better now!!

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"Children would only get in the way of our erotic lifestyle!"

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One of my favorite scenes HAS to be the abortion clinic:
"WHAT IF EINSTEIN'S MOTHER HAD AN ABORTION?!?"
"OR JOHN F. KENNEDY'S, HUH?"
"WHAT IF MARY AND JOSEPH HAD HAD AN ABORTION? WHAT THEN!!!"

"PRO-LIFE! PRO-LIFE! PRO-LIFE!"

Then one of the pickets smacks Lulu across the face,
"THAT'S FROM JESUS! THAT'S WHAT HE WOULD DO, YOU MURDERER!"

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Francine: Oh lulu!! Youve failed every single subject again!
LuLu: No I didnt mom! They changed the grading system! F is for fantastic!!

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Crazee Crackas! When she bites the tire i lose it every time.

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"I'm having an abortion, and I can't wait."

and

"At first I thought he was walking a dog, then I saw that it was his date."

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La Rue: GOOD LORD, FRANCINE, YOU"VE PUT ON ANOTHER TWENTY POUNDS!

"I've made a huge mistake"

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"Purr Francine. Purr, purr Francine!!"

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Francine tries to commit suicide by hanging herself from the stove and Cuddles walks in oblivious:

CUDDLES: Anybody home?

FRANCINE: Oh, God, why hath thou forsaken me?

CUDDLES: Oh, we're goin' on a picnic - come on, come on, Francine.

BRENDA CHENOWITH
1969 - 2051

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Come on Francine. I see we should have gone straight to Peck and Peck after all

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OH HINES...SHE'S STRAIGHT FROM THE GUTTER!!

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OH HINES...SHE'S STRAIGHT FROM THE GUTTER!!

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one of my favorites is
"I wish I could be as optimistic as you, Cuddles. When I look into my future, all I see is a long, dark highway, filled with endless tollbooths and no exits."

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OH HINES...SHE'S STRAIGHT FROM THE GUTTER!!
I used this line when talking to a friend of mine, when he announced that his brother was going to marry some trashy slut.

I said, "But Spud, she's straight from the gutter!"

That marriage didn't last a year.

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I loved it when Elmer went driving around his neighborhood ranting about Francine over a loud-speaker:

Francine Fishpaw lives at 538 Wyman Way. She weighs 300 pounds and is an alcoholic. She eats an entire cake at one sitting. You should see her stretch marks. Because of her drunkenness, both her children are delinquents. She's the hairiest woman I've ever laid eyes on.

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