MovieChat Forums > The Four Seasons (1981) Discussion > How Realistic Is the Film?

How Realistic Is the Film?

posted 15 years ago by dcavalli
20 replies | jump to latest

I love "The Four Seasons." I finally saw it when I was in college in the previous decade. It's an excellent character study. It's been shown recently on HBO's channels. But when you get older and see a film again (and again), you obviously pick up things and start asking questions.

But I wonder how common is it for different couples and friends to vacation together (even for a weekend)? Certainly, a married couple would want time to themselves. (Part of a vacation is getting away from friends as well. Sometimes they can drive you nuts.) Being cramped aboard a boat, a cabin, or in a Mercedes with a group of people, everyone would get on each other's nerves as they do in the film.

Do any of you know a group of couples (2-4 or so) who go on vacation with one another?

Given the characters and what happens to them in each of first three seasons, how realistic is it that they would keep deciding to vacation with one another?

Spring: Everyone has a great time at first. Then Nick decides to dump Anne. Jack and Kate are devestated by the news. (We assume Nick had a modicum of decency and waited to tell Anne when they got home.) I'm sure Danny and Claudia feel the same way when they learn the news.

Summer: Nick brings his nubile new girlfriend with him. They make the others miserable by keeping them up at night by having loud, passionate sex and then swimming naked. Danny drives Jack nuts. Danny complains that the others talk about him behind his back. Claudia feels depressed just by looking at Ginny, who "wears a hanky on her hips that's supposed to be a bathing suit."

Fall: The gang runs into Anne at parents' weekend, which no doubt stirs up bad emotions in everyone. Claudia makes Ginny cry. Jack learns that Nick also cheated on Anne numerous times. (Isn't Jack a little self-centered when tells Nick, "I feel as betrayed as she does!" because he never confided this to him?) Jack and Nick get physical with each other during a soccer game. Kate and Jack have a nasty argument.

No friendship is perfect. But would you keep putting yourself in a situation that usually causes pain and grief and might end up ruining a friendship?

[–] tommary1962 14 years ago

As someone who is among those who have had friendships like this, IMO the film is very realistic. People who become tight, and who are committed to their friendships, do tend to try and work things out.

I would also point out that the film itself points out how they have all become co-dependent and are beginning to hate it.

I find this film, and A Foreign Field, to be very good illustrations of what I call friendship, but with an obviously comedic take on it all.

[–] dcavalli 14 years ago

Do you and your friends go on vacations with one other?

I just wonder how common is it that a married couple goes on vacations (note the plural) with other couples especially after bad things keep happening, as they do in the film. That's what I meant when I asked if this part of the film is realistic.

[–] terrytaylor-music 14 years ago

My father, who is now 80, took vacations with a few other couples for close to twenty years! They would each put money into a special bank account to save for their next vacation. They went to Mexico, Canada, and Europe as well as other locations closer to their home in Los Angeles, California. I don't know how involved they were in each other's personal lives, but this "vacation club" was something they enjoyed until advancing age made it too difficult to continue.

[–] orioleadams 14 years ago

I worked for many years with a guy whose wife never wanted to go on a vacation alone with him - it always had to be a "group trip" with her parents and her cousin and his wife (Margie and Stosh - if I live to be a million I'll never forget this guy yelling over the phone "Do G--Dam-ed Margie and Stosh have to come with us **everywhere**??") And this guy and his wife were not youngsters - they were in their late 40s at the time, and her parents were in their 70s. But apparently she couldn't cut the apron strings. And even when her folks weren't able to accompany them, Margie and Stosh were always more than willing to go wherever and do whatever. My other co-workers and I came to the conclusion that for some reason this guy's wife just didn't want to spend extended periods alone with him.

[–] Tjcat 14 years ago

I saw this movie as a mere child of 19, and while I enjoyed it, I did not realize what a masterpiece it truly is.

Thirty years have passed and I now view the characters in a much different light.

At age 19 I wondered why the couples were listening to the lovemaking on the sailboat did not make some noise themselves.
Now I understand.
As Alan Alda's character said, we didn't loose (passion) it just comes in waves. Very true.

Is this film realistic? I think it is.

In my own experience I see similarities. I go on ski vacation with two couples every year.
Sometimes we share the same condo, sometimes we do not. Sometimes we meet at the airport
and all fly together, sometimes we do not.
Sometimes we all ski together as a group and sometimes we do not.
It is ironic, like Rita Moreno's character, one of the women in our group is an accomplished artist.

All of us are professionals with college degrees and a couple of us have completed graduate school.
Luckily no one in our group has divorced, had a serious illness or died....yet.

I especially liked Carol Burnett's speech about how you get to know some people well enough
that they start to become a pain in the ass. We have remained friends because of good boundaries.

We see one another periodically during the year but only travel together for ski trips.
I am very thankful for the time I share with these good friends.

[–] Mccadoo 13 years ago

During my first marriage a group of us (six couples)would go away to a cabin in New Hampshire that one couples family owned four times a year, during each season just like this movie.

It wasn't the only vacations any of us took but the tradition lasted for eighteen years, eventually being cut down to once a year (summer)as we got older but it even survived my divorce, my ex-wife and her husband and my then fiance, now wife, and I where all there together on several occasions, we all got along fine. My now wife is my age and actually my ex wife is 12 years younger than me.

Anyway, it was a great time and I still miss it. It finally ended when some couples moved away and some just drifted away. It was fun while it lasted though.

[–] flour-girl 13 years ago

The Four Seasons' depiction of married couples vacationing together is very, very close to reality: bickering, and the kind of friendship that is genuine love, and who-pays-what. But in real life we human beings don't articulate as well as they do in a screenplay.

My best vacations with my husband have been group vacations. We've been together for 29 years, and the first 10 years we took two wonderfully romantic vacations alone (Oahu and Grand Canyon), and I woudn't trade the memory of them for anything.

But as time goes on, friendship becomes more important than romance. Husband and wife as friends, but also, other couples with whom we share common interests.

In our case, our BEST vacation was a couple of years ago: a cruise to Belize with 3 other couples. My husband and I were blissfully alone at night. But each day, he and I pursued our own interests. I went to the Mayan ruins of Al Tun Ha, and he went fishing in the amazing azure of the Carribbean. PERFECT. Then, late at night over a pinot noir we argued about who had the best time. Heaven.

But back at the docks, all eight of us argued (fought) about where we parked the van. Ah, life.

Lady, the god YOU pray to is too busy being indicted for tax fraud.

[–] pjpurple-1 12 years ago

It seemed realistic to me. I know people who like to vacation with friends. And except for the Caribbean trip and skiing, the other trips seemed like brief weekend getaways. I'd estimate the whole time they spend together on these trips (in the film) totaled about three or four weeks out of the year. The rest of the time their professions kept them busy. At least the men had jobs and probably couldn't get away with friends very often. I don't recall if the other wives worked outside the home except for Annie's foray into the world of photography.

When you are close friends you do tend to see each others faults, argue, get very blunt with each other. But it doesn't mean you don't care.

Kate had some heartfelt moments at the end where she talked about wanting to "have friends". She mentions how other people have drifted out of their lives because they were too busy or too much of a pain in the #ss to be with. But she really wants to keep the friends she has even though they argue and drive each other crazy at times.

[–] flour-girl 12 years ago

Good post, PJPurple...no one could have said it better.

Kind Regards, Flour-girl

Lady, the god YOU pray to is too busy being indicted for tax fraud.

[–] mloessel 12 years ago

I've watched this movie several times and don't know why. I don't relate because I've never vacationed with friends or family the way these couples characters did. This movie is the main reason why I prefer action/adventure movies and sci/fics. You've got three middle-aged couples spending vacations together. At the beginning of the movie the husband of one of three couples decides to divorce his wife and the other two couples have to deal with it. When the new girlfriend joins them she is treated like an outsider as the two middle-aged ladies try to sort their feelings. The new younger lady was played by Bess Armstrong. She didn't work for me. There were some funny scenes but overall very dry. Alan Alda dropped off my favorite actors list when MASH ended and he became a cinema actor. None of his projects appealed to me. That's too bad because Rita Moreno and Carol Burnett are established actors with an impressive resume. Except for this dry toast of a movie.

[–] 12 years ago

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[–] lroy77 12 years ago

I'm going to take this film personally from now on. The actor who plays Nick has a daughter with my real name. And Beatrice Alda and I share the same birthday (only she's a year ahead).

[–] 12 years ago

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[–] Kroyall1962 12 years ago

Amen to that. Dennis looked like a bag lady with bad dental work. Bess Armstrong is a babe. Of course I don't see Armstrong going for the dude in the movie. That is one thing that WAS unrealistic about it and that remains an issue in movies today. Average looking, out of shape dudes getting smart and beautiful wives and girlfriends is pretty rare in real life.

[–] horsenbuggy 8 years ago

If you paid attention, he wasn't out of shape. He was very athletic. During the fall soccer game he was the only one who scored and he did so multiple times. This was 1980, they didn't waste hours in the gym looking like body builders, they actually played sports to be fit.

[–] parks8321 12 years ago

I married an older man and he has friends that are just as exclusionary. Thus, I would say that the movie is VERY realistic. Before I did marry him, they did everything that they possibly could to "run me off." We prevailed and do not see them much now. But, what can you do? They are Babyboomers and as such, are a whiny, complaining bunch in the first place---again, just like in the movie.

[–] artistathome 12 years ago

I first saw this movie at age 31 and loved it altho I wondered about the "older" couples and whether they ever had sex at all.

Later on in my 40s and 50s I noticed that with each passing decade the movie said different things to me! Especially in my late 40s with a child in college and the romance going away and all the responsibilities crowding in.

We used to go on golfing vacations and ski vacations with friends. I don't think it is unusual at all in your 30s 40s and 50s to do that. Or with family that you get along with!

Now we have been married 41 years! Yes! and I just watched the movie again. i found it in my old collection of VHS tapes.

I enjoyed it thoroughly and could not get over how I now at 62, I view the couples as "young" that I once thought were old and prob never had sex!

I remember thinking Ginny seemed so young back in 1981. I realize NOW, she was probably in her early 30s and the rest of them in their late 40s and 50s. So yes she seemed like a kid, to them, but in reality she was a grown woman.

I am 62 now and the movie is simply good fun and very realistic to me.

There is always one person like Jack who wants to get into everyone's head and "don't rock the boat". And someone like Nick who rocks the boat and brings in the new person who doesn't completely fit in!

Great movie/. And unlike a lot of 80s movies that don't hold up...this one does!!

[–] artistathome 9 years ago

Just bought it last week for 5.99 at Target and watched it today AGAIN.

Now I am 64 and no one has added a post since my last one in June of 2012.

In june of 2013 my husband and I moved 45 mins closer to our daughter altho we are still in the same town. A big town. I never thought I would do that, but times do change but this movie stays the same altho we have different reactions to it as we get older!

I relate to this movie even in a more different way now than I did in 1981 or 1991 or 2001 or 2012 the last time I saw it.

With each decade my thoughts on marriage and friendship have changed. And YES vacationing with the same friends is quite normal.
Now we vacation mostly with my sisters and their husbands and all or our kids/grandkids. My family is now more my true friends than married couples.

Our friends have drifted in and out, they have gotten divorced, they have married children and grandchildren. And grandchildren are such a big change and you babysit them and go to their games, etc and your focus changes.

So when I see TFS now, I laugh and I remember how marriage in my 30s and 40s was. And I can see how I have changed.
This movie helps us to identify with REAL marriages, REAL friendships if we are lucky enough to survive marriage and have the friends.

Great classic movie. Alda is a genius at times.

[–] mmitsos-1 8 years ago

The people in this film are NOT baby boomers---they're all a little older then that, except Bess Armstrong's character. They were pretty much all born before 1945.

[–] horsenbuggy 8 years ago

The one part that doesn't ring true to me is why Claudia and Danny were on the fall trip. It was "parents weekend" at the school where two of the daughters went. So that explains why Jack and Nick were there. Claudia and Danny made a passing reference to seeing their son "tomorrow night" at his school but then we never saw them leave the group. And they drove up in the same car with the others. Anyway, that was the only weak part of the plot. Alda needed a reason for them all to be on vacation and run into Anne. I guess most people overlook this little issue, but I wouldn't go with my friends to see their daughters at parents weekend. That's a little too codependent for my blood.

Otherwise, it's believable that they would vacation together. I vacation with family. But growing up, we went fishing once a year with my dad's best friend's family. We were 10 or more people packed into a tiny 3 bedroom house and loved every minute of it.