My god, Chapaev36, what an eloquent reply. It moved me. You speak with such intelligence and passion. I thought of so many things as I read your reply. If I may...
First, you provide an elegant summation of how an oppressed people can find joy in intolerable circumstance. Secondly, you illustrate perfectly how freedom isn't free and requires courage, sacrifice and commitment to thrive.
It is true, I'm sure that all those ideals that the Communist Party and state propaganda machine pumped 24/7 into your homes, schools and workplace were comforting. Maybe none of it was true, and was enforced through oppression and paranoia, but it did present the illusion that the entire populace is joined together in a common purpose. This is very similar to wartime, that feeling of camaraderie that exists between all citizens as they band together to confront a common enemy. It was a war, a cold war that created a cohesive collective consciousness in opposition of that singular, imperialist foe: The United States.
True freedom does dash all illusions, but in it's place arises a genuine vision of possibility for all citizens. Oppression, Big Brother, centralized, all-powerful control removes options and it also removes responsibility. If a person knows they have no possibilities there is a kind of security that comes from an overriding lack of the fear of *failure*. A person has no obligations to succeed, the state has removed any avenue for said.
"...nothing is left of me, each time I see her..." - Catullus
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