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Favourite MST3K lines


"Tell me honestly - do I look like a cucumber?"

"See that? It means absolutely nothing"

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'Hey it looks like his stone passed him....'

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It's really quiet in space, isn't it?
Yeah....except for the distant sound of trumpets.

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"Hey, your brother's lost some weight!"

"Well, sure it'll explode if you park it over a campfire."

And of course, "I know a weiner man. He owns a hotdog stand..."

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he's beating him with the credits

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I loved the whole sketch that made fun of the 'Zero-G bar fight'.

Crow: "This is between me...and the fire plug."
Servo: "Oh, that's it. Stand back, Joel, you're using my oxygen!"

Joel: "If we're gonna do this, we're gonna do it MY way!"

Servo: "Not the..." (Joel disables the artificial gravity)

(movie's music from that scene plays while Crow and Servo try to fight each other in slow-mo)

Crow: "I'll....get...youuuuuu!!"

Servo: "I waaaaant your heaaaad on a plaaaa--whaaaa!" (Joel shoves Servo and he falls over).



I also loved all the jokes at the expense of Harry, the dumb thug.

Hubbard: "Harry...shoot the young lady."

Crow (as Harry): "Which one?"

Joel (as Hubbard): "The one that's not DEAD, you idiot!"

(pause, then)
Crow (as Harry, who's aiming his gun): "Okay, okay, okay...DON'T move."

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(Fighting during the cartoon title sequence)
"He's beating the titles out of him!"

(When the moon vehicle is about to explode, with inappropriate jazz music playing.)
"Wait, the jazz combo was still in there!"

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"In space...no one can art direct."

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When they show the guy carving the name of an astronaut who died on a memorial plaque and Trace says something about it being a urinal splash guard.

I suggest you look up front...while I check out the rear.

When the lady has a hat on she reminds me of Audrey Hepburn.

The line about the male astronaut with VPL.

I think they missed some jokes about the nipples on the spacesuits - nipple nipple tweak tweak
If it was done later they would have made Batman/nipple jokes and Monorail/Simpsons jokes.

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The line was actually said by James Olson, but it's so cool I'm going to include it here:

"This drink should be called Tijuana Brass Polish"

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Nope, at the very beginning they mention about how cold it must be in space, as James Olson emerges from his ship in his "nipple suit".

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