MovieChat Forums > The Brady Bunch (1969) Discussion > Father punishing the girls -- uh, no

Father punishing the girls -- uh, no

posted 8 years ago by KristenStewartForever
26 replies | jump to latest

In that episode, Jan's Glasses I think it was called, at the end of the episode when Mike Brady said he was gonna ground Jan for not wearing her glasses, I was thinking Jan handled that all wrong compared to in Diff'rent Strokes. When Mike said that to Jan, I was thinking Jan should've said "you can't ground me. You're not my real dad. You're my step-dad. Mom is the only one who can ground me." Arnold said that to Mr. Drummond in an episode of Diff'rent Strokes.

Same when Cindy was a tattle-tale. When Mike threatened to punish Cindy if she didn't stop tattling, I was thinking, she should've been like "you can't punish me. Only mommy can punish me. You're my step-daddy. You're not allowed to punish me."

Marcia never got punished so she's okay.

I mean, c'mon. Kids never allow their step parents to punish them. Only their REAL parents.

These girls were weak with that. Diff'rent Strokes was stronger when it came to standing up to parents. Hell, Willis even moved out against Mr. Drummond's wishes. He walked right out the door, when Drummond demanded him to go upstairs.

[–] pd3145 8 years ago

That scenario would have worked well in the first season, but not later seasons.

Besides, then the topic for that episode would have been why step parents are just as good as regular parents, instead of the actual real plot.

Also the late seventies were much more about individual rights than the early seventies, which concentrated more on the family unit.

[–] 8 years ago

[deleted]

[–] deem_bastille 8 years ago

you are comparing apples to pizza. so many things are not comparable with these two shows.

you can't ground me. You're not my real dad

that crap only started in the 80's. in the seventies kids still honored thy parents.

you also had the kids be the same race with this show. not so with Mr Drummond.

and speaking from the practical side... grounding a kid when you live in an area like the Brady's... really, the parents are grounded, too. you have to stay at home to mind the grounded kid, if the grounded kid is of drivable age, you just lost a driver. it was better to discipline another way in the suburbs.

grounding the kids in the city hit the kids where they lived. no hanging out with friends after school, no tv, no video games/whatever they had, no phone, no radio/computer/record player... you get the idea. being grounded and none of these things with the bradys? you have to share these things with 8 other people so really, who is losing out?

and in the seventies the father still did a lot of the disciplining.

'wait till your father gets home!'

Oh God. Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more.

[–] Owlnut73 8 years ago

They weren't steps. Mike officially adopted the girls, and Carol the boys.Carol even told Bobby in season 1 that the only steps in their house were the ones that lead up to the bedrooms.

[–] Babymarques 8 years ago

Mike did punish Marcia in the father of the year episode. He came down quite hard on her too. But of course it was all resolved by the end of the episode when he won the award.

"And I'm wearing a tuxedo for no apparent reason."

[–] PixieInChains 8 years ago

It always bugged me on the show when Mike talked to the boys and referred to Carol as their "Mother", or Carol referred to Mike as the girls' "Father". "Mom" and "Dad" would have been okay, but using the terms "Mother" and "Father" seemed inappropriate.

[–] 8 years ago

[deleted]

[–] IFeedPigeons 8 years ago

What's the difference?

[–] deem_bastille 8 years ago

mom and dad seem appropriate and normal. mother and father seem a little... sarcastic. like mommie dearest.

Oh God. Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more.

[–] IFeedPigeons 8 years ago

I can't agree. If anything , "mom" and "dad" are terms of endearment for "mother" and "father." As for the film, Christina still calls Joan MOMMIE dearest (you just KNOW that was Crawford's insisting - MOTHER would never have been used - seen as too distant, too formal), because Joan craved to be a good "mommie" (not Mother), at least to the public. Too bad she lacked the capacity to do so.

[–] Htos_Drol 8 years ago

Agreed.

It might work if the Brady Bunch had been a period piece of family life in Victorian England with the children calling Carol and Mike 'mother' and 'father'. Of course, it would have aired on Masterpiece Theater, instead. But with Robert Reed's classical acting roots, it might have been an interesting show to watch!

[–] deem_bastille 8 years ago

Victorian England

yes. very posh and proper. I don't see Mike in dungarees and canvas sneakers being 'father'.

I just can't.

Oh God. Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more.

[–] Catnip86 8 years ago

Wilis was an ungrateful punk from day one. Mr. Drummond should have let him go to foster care. Drummond was legally responsible for them, and yes, he had the power to give them rules and punishments.

My mother was divorced and had my three brothers when she met my father. The terms "step" and "half" were never used, ever. They all called him "Dad" and yes if appropriate, he could punish them.

[–] Htos_Drol 8 years ago

I mean, c'mon. Kids never allow their step parents to punish them. Only their REAL parents.

It seems that the OP is painting all blended families with a single brush. In reality, some blended families are run this way, and some aren't.

What was interesting about the Brady Bunch, it seemed like Mike and Carol had put a lot of thought into how things would be handled prior to getting married. It seems like Carol and Mike were more harsh on their respective biological children. They are often seen having discussions about punishments together in private. One consistent theme of the show was that Mike and Carol put forth a unified front, communicated, were flexible, and even strong enough to admit when they were wrong. I think this is why their family dynamic worked and one of the enduring legacies of the show.

[–] KristenStewartForever 8 years ago

Well, I don't think so. If someone is not the biological parent who helped create you, I feel no matter what, they have no right to punish you. That's why I always fought the man my mother was dating. He felt he could say "I don't have to be your father" and I'm thinking "Uh, yes, you do."

[–] Htos_Drol 8 years ago

I appreciate your view, but I'm a little confused. You feel that non-biological parents have no rights to discipline children in their care, yet you demand that they be fully involved parents. How does that work?

Also, are you suggesting that a child who was adopted into a family where neither adult is a biological parent doesn't have to follow any rules at all? They can do as they please because neither parent has disciplinary rights?

[–] Catnip86 8 years ago

It looks like she wanted it both ways. The man to be the "father" (probably human wallet) when she wanted, but not to be the "father" when it was convenient.

[–] Jennie_Portrait 8 years ago

While I have sympathy with your personal circumstances, I think if a child is living under the care of an adult, then that adult is entitled to enforce the rules in his/her home. That might include certain "punishment", but never physical in nature.

Just my 2 cents. In the case of the Brady Bunch, Carol and Mike were totally in the right to enforce punishment on their natural and adopted children (they did adopt their respective stepchildren).

___________________________________
Never say never...

[–] deem_bastille 8 years ago

I know. I remember from Who's the Boss? when a kid Samantha ^likes^ breaks her heart or something. Jonathan begins to make fun of her or something and Samantha says something along the lines of: Shut up, Squirt!

Angela hears this and first just tells Sam to stop. When sam continues, angela sends her to her room. Sam refuses and then Tony comes in and ends up backing Angela. then before she storms up to her room, Sam is like: you said we were sisters! we're not sisters, we're not even friends!!! -- then of course, Tony looks at angela like: what did you do to my dauta! and angela embarrassed like she was wrong.

and of course, to top it off, that song was depressing and lame for a boyfriend to give to a girlfriend.

So, here, Angela isn't a step mother or anything other than another adult, but Tony backs up angela because when angela is at work, he has to deal with Johnathan and him hanging out with dangerous friends and such.

Oh God. Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more.

[–] deem_bastille 8 years ago

Well then what is the point? It just takes 1 lucky and fast sperm to create a child but it takes a real man to raise a child. There is more to life of a human child than conception. these are not birds who as soon as their babies can fly are pushed out of the nest! these are children who have to be RAISED. the only way to raise them is to discipline them when they botch something. you learn from what not to do more than what TO do.

and you are obviously confusing the man your mother was 'dating' [bedding] and the men who are actually family men who make commitments to the women they want to bed. There is a difference between the dating scene and the commitment scene. a big difference.

Oh God. Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more.

[–] Costumer (1786) 5 years ago

I'm sorry, but that is nonsense. If your biological parent has re-married (whether they are divorced or widowed) that person becomes a parent. They are an adult in the house and for the house to function MUST be able to discipline just like the other parent. Yes, both of the adults should be unified in their approach and should discuss and agree to parameters before the marriage.

If their is a divorced parent, then all three should agree.

No, I'm not so naive as to believe that always, or even commonly, happens. But it is what should happen.

[–] coreycitn63 8 years ago

Marcia got punished in the Father of the Year episode when Marcia snook out to mail the contest letter and dangerously climbed up to her room. She wasn't allowed to go skiing and I doubt Mike would rescind it.

[–] deem_bastille 8 years ago

well, that was still in the first part of the first season of the show. the show was still fleshing out their characters and I thought they did a pretty good job of a father who had only dealt with boys. Mike had a hard time just how to deal with girls, especially when girls are being sneaky.

Now, we know what Marcia was really doing and her heart was in the right place but I just wished she had kind of cleared the sneaking around part with her mother, alice or even greg. let someone else know so they can vouch for your whereabouts. I always say this to my students: if you go to the bathroom alone and you have a situation, how am I to know you need a change of clothes? [they laugh but they get the message].

Oh God. Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more.