Message of the movie = Love without romance/affection doesn't work

The movie shows various relationships that didn't work out -- Ben & Mrs. Robinson; Mr. & Mrs. Robinson; Elaine & Ben; and Elaine & Carl Smith. The common thread in each relationship is a lack of romance / affection.

BEN & MRS. ROBINSON

In this relationship, Mrs. Robinson seems to be motivated by boredom and unhappiness with her current marriage. For example: Mrs. Robinson tells Ben, at the hotel, about how she and Mr. Robinson sleep in different beds, how he's always asleep when she leaves the house to see Ben etc. Plus, when Ben asks her "What did you do today," she says, "I got up, made breakfast." The impression is that she doesn't have a job; she doesn't have much to do. Hence, the fling with Ben was just some way of getting a thrill in life. She didn't really like Ben. That Ben is not particularly handsome merely drills this point.

As for Ben, the impression is that he was just bored and lonely. Notice how, during the party at the beginning, all of the guests were the friends of the parents, not friends of Ben. The feeling is that Ben didn't have any friends. He also didn't know what to do with his future, whether to go to graduate school or not. And finally - his encounter with Mrs. Robinson is clearly his first experience with a woman, given his nervousness and awkwardness. Right before he calls Mrs. Robinson at the hotel, the scene immediately prior is the pool scene where he, in a lonely way, sits at the bottom of the pool, isolated from his family whom he cannot hear. The meaning is that loneliness drives him to engage in the affair with Mrs. Robinson. He didn't like her.

That neither of them likes each other really comes out during their interactions. They fail to communicate smoothly (e.g. he admits that all they do is have sex without talking, she doesn't want to tell him about her life or history or marriage etc.) The absence of romance / love is the cause.

MR. ROBINSON AND MRS. ROBINSON

This relationship fails at the end, as Mr. Robinson admits that he and his wife are about to divorce. The reason the marriage fails is that the two of them don't love each other. The most obvious indication is that Mrs. Robinson finds it necessary to start a fling with Ben, despite her marriage. In addition: As Mrs. Robinson admits, she married Mr. Robinson only because she got pregnant, not because she wanted to marry him. They sleep in different beds, they hardly talk to each other. For this reason, the marriage fails.

ELAINE & CARL SMITH

This relationship fails at the end, as Elaine runs off with Ben. As for why the relationship fails - simply, Elaine & Carl hardly knew each other; and the marriage was set up by the parents. No love = No success.

BEN & ELAINE

Notice when they sit on the bus, their facial expressions are sad, and the film plays the sad song by Simon and Gunfeld. Their facial expressions and the sad song recall the opening scene when Ben, the new graduate, is going through the airport. The feeling, in the opening, is that Ben has just graduated, passed a milestone in life, and is now thinking, "What now?" Likewise, at the end, the feeling is that Ben & Elaine have just married, passed a milestone in life, and are now thinking, "What now?" The suggestion is that Ben & Elaine's marriage won't work out. If they were really in love, then they would not have had these feelings.

I don't believe Ben & Elaine really loved each other. The first issue is that the two of them didn't know each other for that long. I also think Ben's motivation to seek Elaine came from the way Mrs. Robinson told him he wasn't good enough for Elaine (see how Ben gets really agitated when she tells him so). Another feeling is that Ben, again, didn't know what else to do. Chasing Elaine kinda gave him something to do to keep busy. Without chasing Elaine, he would have just sat at the pool doing nothing.

On Elaine's end, right before she screams "BEN!" at the wedding, she looks at the faces of her parents, who set up this marriage with Carl. The significance is that she went with Ben to rebel against her parents, not because she really wanted Ben.