MovieChat Forums > The Caretakers (1963) Discussion > What I learned from The Caretakers...

What I learned from The Caretakers...

posted 15 years ago by singjohn
10 replies | jump to latest

1. Pepsi and a picnic won't solve your mental illness.

2. THX could have killed Polly Bergen.

3. If you are head nurse at a mental hospital, you will be much more effective with proper lighting.

4. If you are going to be committed to a mental hospital, make sure that one of the other inmates is a hairdresser so you always look your best.

5. Make sure the hospital allows smoking in bed.

6. If you are going to be dealing with dangerous mentally ill patients, brush up on your Judo.

7. Always have a fire extinguisher handy.

[–] jeff_bailey44 15 years ago

Spot on, singjohn. I caught this on TCM the other night and my jaw dropped. Complete garbage, and not even fun to watch as camp. Sad waste of a great cast.

Special lighting would not have helped Crawford's appearance. The producers needed to fire the makeup artist and hairstylist who made Joanie look like Elsa Lanchester in THE BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN.

[–] practicepiano 14 years ago

8. The primary symptoms of mental illness are distorted vision and a need to fling your head back and forth, over and over, very quickly.

9. Buxom blonde nurses with suggestive last names are not limited to vaudeville sketches.

[–] Zipper69 14 years ago

When suffering a mental breakdown in a movie theater never run away from the noise and light, instead, make your way to the stage in front of the screen (and the speakers) and stagger up and down screaming until tackled by the ushers.

Come on lads, bags of swank!

[–] Blondfashionisto 14 years ago

This thread is really a hoot!

#10. Don't get locked in a men's ward unless you REALLY want to...

‘Six inches is perfectly adequate; more is vulgar!' (Prime of Miss Jean Brodie Re: An open window).

[–] IceboxMovies 13 years ago

#11: If the director of a movie about mentally-insane women can go on to direct a movie about a talking seagull, anything is possible in Hollywood.

"What I don't understand is how we're going to stay alive this winter."

[–] Blondfashionisto 12 years ago

BUMP

'That's not a hairstyle, it's a cry for help!'

[–] practicepiano 12 years ago

#12 Susan Oliver looks good when not covered in green or extreme-old-age-and scarring make-up (OK, so I learned that from a combination of this movie and Star Trek).

[–] berensalana 9 years ago

#13 - Adding a little rubbing alcohol to punch really gives it that extra kick!

[–] AuntJaney 9 years ago

14. If you want to know the truth about electroshock therapy, maybe don't believe the nurse administering it...(who's only watched)....

15. Connie apparently has the same dramatic coach as the Jets in West Side Story....

16. Nurse Lucretia has spent 20 years protecting her nurses from those 'spoiled, coddled children' that made their jobs possible.

17. Nurse Lucretia was 30 years too early to play Cassie in A Chorus Line, but she had the gams and the leotard (and the scarf)

18. If you have a picnic for mentally-ill patients on meds, be sure and serve a drink at the picnic loaded with caffeine and sugar!

19. All the nurses who passed muster for Nurse Lucretia's nursing staff could apparently succeed a weigh-in and measurement requirement for the Rockettes.

[–] AuntJaney 9 years ago

20. They didn't list this piece of trivia either here, or on Wikipedia; but apparently the Man from Uncle was filthy dirty and didn't care.

21. They don't take away your nail file/can openers in mental wards.

22. Get the patient to sign a waiver about possessions that include small pets.

23. They didn't have the browlift surgeries they have today; that's how Nurse Lucretia could still close her eyes to every new idea.

24. Everyone just pushes Gramma Walton away.

25. Herbert Marshall was told by his agent that the script was based on W. Somerset Maugham.