Fake Morlocks, and other swiped ideas
Writer-director Edward Bernds didn't have to stretch himself very much to make the inaptly-named Valley of the Dragons, considering how much stock footage, plot points and sundry other ideas he "borrowed" from other films to paste this one together. Some examples, plus a couple of other fun points....
>>>About half the film seems to consist of stock footage from 1940's One Million B.C.. All the "dinosaurs" (actually poor tortured lizards) and "mastodons" (elephants with shag rugs attached) were originally tortured and shagged for that film. Bernds even made sure to have his caveman actors look like those in OMBC so he could match shots of cave people from the earlier movie with his. (When the old tribal leader with the beard gets picked up by a mastodon you can see it's a totally different guy from the actor sentenced to -- I mean hired for -- Valley of the Dragons.)
>>>Bernds also stole and modified part of the plot line from OMBC, the stuff about one man drifting into the realm of another tribe, getting saved by the tribe's only blond, and eventually helping bring both "normal" tribes together after the usual cataclysm. Of course this time he doubled that plot aspect by having this happen to both male protagonists. Bernds was nothing if not innovative. Okay, don't say it. This plot has been used elsewhere too, as in When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth (1970), for one.
>>>As many have noted, Bernds swiped a few shots from Rodan in the movie, for no apparent reason other than to insert another monster. All Rodan gets to do is briefly flap around near the beginning, then reappear later peeking bemusedly over a hill, take off and fly back and forth some more, clearly intelligent enough to stay high above the theatrical proceedings below.
>>>On the other hand, Ed Bernds did not steal Morlocks from the previous year's film The Time Machine, as many claim. No. Edward Bernds stole the Morlocks' look from that film and had his make-up man make a fake rip-off of the Morlocks. Note that their faces are more like skulls, not the lumpy countenance of a true Morlock but an imitation anorexic Morlock. Lesslocks?
>>>The most pitiful theft comes at the climactic scene where the cave people are trapped in their homestead by a dinosaur lurking outside -- stolen from one of the most abysmal films of all time, Bert I. Gordon's King Dinosaur (1955). Even for Ed Bernds, that's lowering yourself.
>>>Bernds even stole from himself. The attack on the two heroes over their campfire by "Neanderthals" is directly taken from the "mutates'" attack on the time travelers in Bernds's World Without End (1956). The fight with the pillow spider and one guy getting caught in the web is also taken from WWE (not to mention Bernds had already re-used this in his Queen of Outer Space in 1958). I can't quite tell if the spider is the same puppet. Looks like him, but then again maybe not quite. Perhaps Bernds couldn't retrieve the original and had his otherwise unemployable special effects artists make a dupe. He even calls the blond cave girl "Deena", the same name he gave the servant girl in World Without End. Of course, she was a brunette.
>>>And what about those "Neanderthals" and "Morlocks"? The Neanderthals in their plastic masks attack the boys' camp, get beaten off (as it were), then disappear from the film altogether. Same with the fake Morlocks: they show up in the cave, have their two minutes of fame, then just vanish from the film. They're never even mentioned again. At least the Neanderthals get an offhand reference a couple of times later on. I guess it's because the actors playing them had to get paid, while stock footage is dirt cheap, so Bernds had to limit their screen time.
>>>Then there's all those marvelous bits of miscellany: The landscapes the actors stand in don't match the landscapes in the stock shots. All the guys do half the time is watch tedious scenes of magnified lizards and other critters killing each other, eating each other, falling into holes, getting mangled and crushed, and assorted other animal rights abuses. And just how did that air and volcanoes and water all get swept onto the comet again? Oh, and at the climax when Hector "blows up" the mountain with his gunpowder, the rocks suddenly start to fall but there's no actual explosion. However, when the boulders hit the monster down below, he suddenly explodes. This is not explained.
>>>And for a 19th-century military man, Hector seems to be pretty well schooled in pretty much everything, especially astronomy. He knows all the stars (although he did at first mistake the rising Earth for the Moon -- I guess it was seeing Great Britain and Africa and the Atlantic and stuff that tipped him off). He knows exactly how, why and where they ended up. He knows the comet's orbital period (100,000 years). Later he confidently relates that the comet's last glancing blow shifted its orbit so they'll return in only seven years, and doesn't seemed overly concerned at the possibility that that time they might crash into Earth instead of simply being deposited back on it. (Presumably with the cave people, the Neanderthals, the Morlocks, Rodan and all the stock lizards and mastodons, though I noticed he didn't take these problems into consideration.) Plus he knows all about Neanderthals with plastic faces, oh and how to make perfect gunpowder without precise measurements. Not to mention, as Michael admiringly notes, as a Frenchman Hector always manages to find a woman.
>>>This is certainly the only movie ever made that states its source material twice in the opening credits. Not once but twice we read: "Based on the Novel 'Career of a Comet' by Jules Verne". What's that? I missed it the first time reaching for my popcorn. Can you repeat the book it's based on? Wow? Really? Thanks. Honestly, this is really kind of pathetic. Like Ed Bernds just had to hit us over the head by repeating the same credit a second time within about forty seconds, just to make sure we really got that this came from a novel by the same man who provided other filmmakers with the stories for 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, Around the World in Eighty Days, From the Earth to the Moon, Journey to the Center of the Earth and numerous other adventure tales. Granted, Verne's works were in public domain so anyone could use them, but Edward Bernds wasn't about to let questions of cost derail his creative ideas. Well, all right, he was, but at least he got the movie made. A whole week out of his life, you know.
>>>And just a random final thought. What valley? What dragons?
Anyway, it's all mostly fun. A bit slow and repetitive at times, one way or another you've seen most of it before, cheaply done and utterly ridiculous, but it's mostly entertaining and the two leads (Cesare Danova, the future Mayor Carmine DePasto from Animal House and Sean McClory, Major Kibbee of Them!) actually make a good team. And former Playmate Joan Staley would be enough to make any man forget he'd been swept onto a comet and shot out into space. If not enough to forget that he was forced to star in this thing.