MovieChat Forums > Strangers When We Meet (1960) Discussion > Husband Not Interested in Maggie?

Husband Not Interested in Maggie?

posted 15 years ago by monet2004
21 replies | jump to latest

I love "Strangers When We Meet", but I don't understand why Maggie's Husband doesn't want to be with her. When Maggie (Kim Novak) talks about passion to him, he says he does not like to talk about those things. What's with him? I don't understand his character although I watched the movie a gazillion times.

I love and dislike the ending because these two people are in love. You don't find love all the time and they did, but they end separating. It's so bitter sweet. I wish there was a happier ending, but I guess as the title says "strangers when we meet.

[–] joewhiteyipee 15 years ago

I wondered the same thing. What was wrong with her husband? Maybe it was intentionally left to the veiwers to conclude.

[–] geejijoe 15 years ago

He was emotionally and physically bankrupt when it came to his relationship with Maggie. He was portrayed as a nice enough guy, understanding and trusting when she was supposedly going to meet her friends one evening, but she actually had that first drink with Larry. Even her mom said Maggie married the "first nice boy" that came along. But he had some hang up that was apparent in that one scene in their bedroom; he couldn't even talk to her about it when she wanted some intimacy and he did not. They were both young and beautiful - hard to understand why he couldn't return her passion.

[–] joewhiteyipee 15 years ago

Right. He clearly loved her. Something gave me the impression he---as many very religious persons do---might have found sex sinful outside procreation. Otherwise, I'm thinking he was either impotent or homosexual.

[–] geejijoe 15 years ago

I also wondered if his religion could be the cause, but this was not even hinted at, so I thought maybe he was impotent. Maggie asked him "don't you want me?" and he responded of course he did, but... But there was no mention of that type of problem in the conversations between Maggie & Larry when they spoke of their spouses. We'll just have to wonder. I love this movie.

[–] joewhiteyipee 15 years ago

At one point didn't she say something like "Sex is not a sin!"?

[–] geejijoe 15 years ago

Well, you could be right, but I don't remeber her saying "sex." That would have perked my ears. I'll have to watch again. Doesn't she say something like passion is not a sin, or passion is not a dirty word? I think that was when she talking to Ken before leaving to meet Larry at the restaurant the 1st time.

[–] joewhiteyipee 15 years ago

You're probably right. I'm just saying that her use of the word "sin" might reveal that her husband did have some sort of hangup due to his religious philosophy.

[–] monet2004 15 years ago

Thanks for the insight. It was as if Maggie's husband was afraid to talk about passion. Maggie says to him in one scene that passion is not a dirty word. It did not occur to me that it could be his personal religion. I had thought that he might have been homosexual or a medical condition. Each time I watch it, that one scene perplexes me, but the love she and Larry discovered makes up for it.

[–] Panamint 15 years ago

i don't get it either- the scene where husband is not interested. All I could
guess is that maybe he knows about some prior indiscretions of hers, is disgusted and is only staying with her for the child's sake. Or, maybe she wants him to do something physically that he's not into. These are weak but only guesses.

[–] addison3 12 years ago

It was 1960! Horny Kim and Kirk kept their forbidden love a secret! Kim is certainly on the prowl. The scene with her hair in curlers is funny she tries to be the housewife. She really wants Kirk to rip her clothes off! This movie as a kid taught m,e the birds and the bees. It was always on the 4:30 movie on ch7

[–] Panamint 14 years ago

I just can't determine that the problem in Maggie's marriage must be
assigned to the husband 100%. I will go 50-50 Maggie/husband. After all,
at the end of the movie she is detached physically from both the husband and
physically from Kirk's character (because he ended the affair). And wasn't there another guy (the one-night stand) that was a disaster? Three strike outs- that's not a good track record for her.

Maybe the theory that it was "the times" that prevents her from being fulfilled is a good one.

[–] jmars35264 14 years ago

I recall Ken saying at the party when the spouses were discussing relationships in their marrages that he's had no complaints yet. He's either in total denial or so wrapped up in his job he can't see the forest for the trees.

[–] Dog112 13 years ago

A lot of people were like that in those days. They were brought up in traditional, puritanical ways, and they were taught not to show (or even to have) emotion, and not to talk about sex, which was dirty.

Radio and TV were the same way.

Playboy magazine was very risque and dirty, even though it didn't show much.

No one talked about sex or sexual techniques. Most men assumed that women didn't like sex. They didn't know that women could be aroused in a sexual way. This belief continued after marriage. Many women went to their graves never having known the joy of sex.

If it hadn't been for Hugh Hefner, The Pill, penicillin, the Kinsey Report, and pop psychology, we would not have had free love in the 60's and 70's, and we might still be just as naive and uptight today.
.

[–] jmars35264 12 years ago

I don't know about you but I was 21 years old in 1960 and sex was on my mind 24/7. I also found women in those days liked sex and I encountered many experiences where they were the more aggressive. Oh to be young again, what a fun time.

[–] pouncemo 11 years ago

What you said about most men assuming that women didn't like sex really rings true to me. Even now days, my daughter's former boyfriend, who is 22, has expressed similar beliefs. He was raised Mormon and even though it is a religion where you are often encouraged to have a lot of children, he seems to have picked up the idea that women don't like sex or being pregnant and only do it to get the babies. I didn't think kids were made to feel so guilty about it these days. Poor guy.

[–] Sibyla01 12 years ago

He was obviously not as passionate as she was and needed. There are such men, you know, and it´s very painfull and shamefull for them, not to by sufficient to the sexual needs of their wives. They are not impotent, they are just cold. He loved her as much as he could, but it wasn´t enough for her, and he suffered for it.

[–] 12 years ago

[deleted]

[–] TracesOfLove 12 years ago

Sometimes especially back in the day, once a man married and had children with a woman, he would stop seeing her as a sexual being. The old madonna/whore thing. He loves his wife and doesn't want to do the nasty things to her that he had before he "made an honest woman out of her." I don't know if this was the case in the film but the way the husband was it's the only thing that makes sense. If he wasn't so loving towards her I would've assumed he was just tired of steak and yearned for a burger.

...even in a valley without mountains the wind could still blow.

[–] qopus1988 10 years ago

"I love "Strangers When We Meet", but I don't understand why Maggie's Husband doesn't want to be with her"

He's gay. The movie was made in 1960. They couldn't say it directly so it was said with the conspicuous twin beds, and the phone ringing, and his collapsing his head on her shoulder at the end of the scene. Don't overthink it.

[–] raketex 10 years ago

I haven't seen the movie in a few years so can you refresh my memory?

The "twin beds" was common in movies and sitcoms in the 1960's so I wouldn't ascribe any particular relevance to that, and "his collapsing his head on her shoulder" might, I grant you, be a behavioral clue, but what is the deal about "the phone ringing"?

Is that some reference to other possible lovers of Maggie calling her?