MovieChat Forums > Hamlet, Prinz von Dänemark Discussion > Favorite Riffs

Favorite Riffs

posted 21 years ago by Film316
41 replies | jump to latest

This was just on Saturday and what makes this painful is that Hamlet is my favorite Shakespeare play. What saved this movie was the continual riffing from Mike and the Bots. Therefore, here's a list of my favorite riffs:

1. Hamlet walks down the hall wearing a cape, and a fanfare is playing.

Mike: It's Hamlet-Man!

2. The whole "To Be or Not To Be" soliliquy.

Crow: I'll take "To Be" for $50, Alex.

3. Whenever Hamlet walks past his mother.

Servo: [cough]Incest[cough]!

Gertrude asks Hamlet to sit by her.

Servo: Yes, my hosebag--I mean "Mom".

4. Claudius and play actors with big chains.

Servo: Rap artist Notorious K.I.N.G.

Mike: Run DMC Everett Koop.

Servo: And now, "The Tragedy of King Vitaman".

Please, share with us.

[–] torquemama2002 20 years ago

The fart sounds when Ophelia sits on the stone bench.

"Scott(Stevens), you and I have done this before. Come get the Cup!"

[–] 20 years ago

[deleted]

[–] ptrschckl 20 years ago

"His Royal Majesty, Rip Taylor!"

"Night fever, night fever... we know how to do it."

"Oh, you can brood here -- I'm done."

"*GASP* That's from 'Hamlet' isn't it?"

"It's The Hamlet Shooooooow! The Hamlet Show Theeeeeeeeme!"

"SUM UP!!!"

"What's worse than clowns?... DANISH CLOWNS!"

"But it's cherry-flavored kids' poison -- he should love it!"

"Ah, she's trying to Section-8 her way out of the movie."

"Heh-heh-heh! People love my 'Wheat' act."

"Hamlet FAXED me a soliliquy!"

"Boy, you know he's just beatin' back a monologue right now..."

"Hell, the Queen drinks to ANYTHING!"

"Ok, show the ghost... To the ghost. The ghost! Cut to the ghost!... Camera two! Cut to camera two!"

"*GULP* Mmmmm, I got the worm."

"The great 'What time is it?' argument from Hamlet."

***Fetch me my Warrior Mumu!***
-- Crow T. Robot as 'Captain Santa Claus'

[–] MikeisBored 19 years ago

Tom (as jester): "heheheheeh I got a stick! Hehheh!"

Crow: "Uh, TO BE.."
Tom: nonono not yet!
Crow: oh, ok

[–] knightm7 19 years ago

I just bought it for Christmas for my wife and I, quotes are not verbatum

Mike says as Claudius starts praying: "To be, or. . .No wait, that's not right"
They have Polonius say of the acting-clown: "It's no good, they won't go away."
Hamlet says after the Yorick speech: "Let's get out of here, I made it all up anyways, I never knew him."
The entire opening of the To be or not to be speech is Hamlet laying down on the stairs, looking through two steps where all we see are his eyes and steps: "Ouch, a step is digging into my shins."
Hamlet is talking to Claudius and smiles for a second :"Whow, mood swing!"
Laertes dies in someone's arms:"Hold me, elongated Phil Collins."
The entire movie when Claudius speaks cause he sounds like Mr Roark or Khan, but the MST3K guys never say a word about it.

Well, well, well. . . Well, well, well. . .

[–] mx1349 19 years ago

Crow: (While Hamlet is dying) "Is there a word in the English language this guy hasn't said yet?"

Tom: (While people are dancing) "Night, baby, night fever. We know how to do it."

Crow: (As Hamlet and Claudius (I think it was Claudius) embrace) "How's it hanging, ya son of a...!"

[–] ptrschckl 19 years ago

Yeah, I noticed the Khan-ness of Claudius' voice after a few lines, too. And actually, Mike and the bots DO point it out. It's quick and easy to miss, but at some point Servo says, "... with rich Corinthian leather." It's a nod to some commercials that Ricardo Montalban did -- that was the catchphrase. Besides, there's a good chance it WAS Ricardo Montalban, considering the movie was dubbed over in the '60s.

***My nipple came off, you jerk!!!***

[–] knightm7 19 years ago

Oh, yeh, I think I remember that line and I know that it means Mantalban. I must be him, it seems to be a general concensious of people responding to this message board about this MST3K episode.

Well, well, well. . .Well, well, well. . .

[–] 19 years ago

[deleted]

[–] ih8tt 19 years ago

Yeah, I noticed the Khan-ness of Claudius' voice after a few lines, too. And actually, Mike and the bots DO point it out. It's quick and easy to miss, but at some point Servo says, "... with rich Corinthian leather." It's a nod to some commercials that Ricardo Montalban did -- that was the catchphrase. Besides, there's a good chance it WAS Ricardo Montalban, considering the movie was dubbed over in the '60s.

Per his bio page @http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001544/
49. Hamlet, Prinz von Dänemark (1961) (TV) (voice: English version) (uncredited) .... Claudius
... aka Hamlet (USA)

[–] ejm32-1 18 years ago

Crow: "What is it, cold water on the groin? I mean, Polonius?"

Servo: (Horatio has just gotten Hamlet's letter from England) "D'oh! Ophelia invoiced me for the wheat!"
Mike: "Hamlet faxed me a soliloquy!"

Mike: (Hamlet has heard Polonius behind the curtain) "Oh,no, not the service master! Oh!"

Mike (Gertrude drinks the poison) (as Gertrude): "Boy, that was good. I drank a lot!"
Servo (as Claudius): "Look, shut up!"

"So Lone Starr, now you see that evil will always triumph, becuase good is dumb." Dark Helmet

[–] Sm5454 18 years ago

Ladies and gentlemen, Patti Labelle!

[–] ejm32-1 18 years ago

Polonius: "My good lord!"
Crow: "I'm out of styling mousse!"

Polonius: "Dear Ophelia, what is the matter?"
Ophelia: "Father, I am frightened!"
Polonius: "Of what?"
Servo: "Your hair!"

Crow: (as Hamlet when he finds Claudius praying)"Man, my uncle's got a great ass, no wonder mom's into him!"

Mike: (as Claudius) "Cut his throat in a church! I oughta smack him!"

"So Lone Starr, now you see that evil will always triumph, becuase good is dumb." Dark Helmet

[–] theamazingando 18 years ago

I'm watching this one RIGHT THIS SECOND, by the way....

Mike : So, "I'm a chicken for not stabbing myself", that's ALL you needed to say! (after the famous 2BON2B soliloquy)

Servo : (as Ghost of Hamlet's Father) Move thine ass.

Crow : Moe, Larry, and Horatio...

*raspberry sound as Claudias kisses Gertude's hand*

Servo : Losertes!
Crow : Craplet!

Servo : Yeah, Hamlet, why don't you RAM-let?
Crow : Yeah? Shut up, Claudi-ASS!

Servo : Oh boy, there's gonna be railing kills!

Crow : This place could use a shrub, or...hell, even a stick would cheer it up.

Hamlet : Horatio!
Horatio : At your service, sweet Lord.
Crow : Good, go wash my car.

[one of the bots (forgot which)] : Sychronize royal asses!

Horatio : He was a goodly king
Hamlet : He was a man. Taken for all in all, I shall not look upon his like again.
Crow : Why were you lookin' at his like?

Crow : (as Hamlet died) Have we achieved deadness?

Mike : (as Claudias dismisses Rosencrantz and Guildenstern) Man, they gotta be gay...

Mike : Hey, her occasional chair just found an occasion.

===============================
Ando has SPOKEN!!!
...and they rejoiced...
...yaaaaaay.....

[–] ptrschckl 18 years ago

Hamlet (as he's dying): Polonius...
Mike (groggily): ...what a stupid name.

Or maybe it was "Horatio..." Either way, it's pretty funny.

[–] MattchuLB 18 years ago

Move thine ass.

www.freewebs.com/mattchulb

[–] nbates-2 18 years ago

I actually lived a good portion of my chilhood in Denmark and I found the riff during a fanfare scene really funny.

"Celebrate everyone! Garrison Keillor's leaving Denmark!"

Priceless, provided you know the background.

And of course, "Hair by bozo" & "Filmed on location at the San Quentin prison"

[–] lonelylight 18 years ago

Uhm... perhaps I'm stupid, but where do you get all these? They're hilarious! Are you making this stuff up or are there actually sound-files or something with this comments?
Hamlet's my favourite Shakespeare play, too, but Maximilian Schell just did what must be the worst Hamlet interpretation of all times.

[–] 18 years ago

[deleted]

[–] sfmonkeyboy 18 years ago

I think my all time favorite is when Hamlet is talking to the ghost of his dead father. The camera stays on Hamlet's face the entire time the ghost is talking.
Servo: The Ghost. Cut to the Ghost. CUT TO THE GHOST.