Things we learned from A&OL


There was a Things We Learned thread here a few years ago but it got deleted. So...

1) Old guys who go missing in Brooklyn don't get investigated.
2) The only time the Brooklyn Dodgers could win the World Series is on Halloween, literally.
3) Nearly all of New York's cops in the 1930s-40s were of Irish descent. (History suggests that this is very likely true.)
4) Insane asylums have too many Theodore Roosevelts. They don't have enough George Washingtons or Abraham Lincolns, and hardly any Napoleon Bonarpartes.
5) Dr. Witherspoon may be committing the wrong Brewster.
6) During the Panama Canal construction, President Theodore Roosevelt personally buried each yellow fever victim all by himself.
7) The Panamanian yellow fever epidemic spread even to the window seat.
8) Dr. Einstein is a renowned physician, and something of a magician.
9) It's not a good idea to get plastic surgery from a doctor who is an alcoholic and has just watched a Frankenstein movie.
10) Insanity runs in the Brewster family. It practically gallops.
11) To have authority to commit your brother to the funny farm, you have to be a biological brother, as an adopted brother doesn't count.

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12. O Hara is such a bad cop that he doesn't even think it's a big deal when someone is tied up and gagged. He also didn't even bother to phone his station to let them know where he was.
13. If someone yells that there's 13 dead bodies in the celler of a house you'll think they are crazy.
14. The best way to poison someone is to use a gallon of Elderberry Whine, one teaspoon full of arsenic, then add half a teaspoon full of strychnine, and then just a pinch of cyanide.
15. Jonathan hates Boris Karloff so much he'll try to kill anyone who says he looks like him.
16. Someone can go 48 hours without sleep and still be pretty functional.

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17. Being poisoned with a combination of arsenic, cyanide, and strychnine is a calm and peaceful death.

In truth it would be horribly painful. Aunt Abby and Aunt Martha were truly insane if they thought their victims had "peaceful" deaths.

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18. The best way to get Teddy Brewster to sign his real name is to tell him he's signing a secret paper that can't be traced back to him.
19. Teddy Roosevelt can't tell the difference between toys and real ships.
20. The Man in Indiana wouldn't have died of pneumonia if Jonathan hadn't shot him.

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