Chet is an evil, evil man


For a supposedly family orientated film, the Great Outdoors depicts a movie monster for the ages.

We're barely a few minutes into the picture before we see the giant brute pressuring his clearly unwilling wife into sex. The poor woman eventually gives in, probably realising the futility of resisting such an oversized foe. God knows for how many years of their marriage, this has been happening. She even has to comply with his perverted role-playing exercises just to placate him. Small wonder he reacts so violently to being recorded by Roman. He can no doubt already visualize the words "Exhibit A" being stamped on the cassette.

Later on, when Roman and Chet are talking about the surrounding forestry, Roman launches into admittedly overenthusiastic spiel over the commercial potential of the land. But instead talking over the issue like a sensible adult, either agreeing with Roman or maybe taking the conservationist angle, Chet just cuts him dead with a decidedly snarky "I just see trees". Proof that however buffoonish Roman becomes, Chet will always have a lock on the most facetious dickhead of the movie award.

That evening, the great dolt deliberately tries to spook out several young children with an exaggerated tale of his own heroism. After completely ignoring the fact that Roman has just read the obituary of an admired colleague and may be grieving, Chet launches into a tall tale of how he saved the lives of himself and his wife by gallantly repelling a giant bear. What's worse is that no-one seems to challenge him on the fact that he assaulted an innocent creature with a deadly weapon just because it happened to walk by his uncle's shack. The craven psychopath.

The jet-ski scene barely needs any explanation. How can you reason with a man determined to ignore his own pompous advice by refusing to let go of the towrope? After being dragged across the bay through nobody's fault but his own, he then decides to throw a massive temper tantrum and attempt to leave. What a big baby.

The scene at the diner reveals the true (gargantuan) measure of the man. Chet barely bats an eyelid at the thought of wolfing down a 96 ounce steak and even starts showboating before taking the first bite. Whereas most people would be hallucinating like Homer Simpson before they are even half way through, Chet duly manages to finish the steak, gristle and all. What a truly sickening thing that his one achievement in life should be in the field of gross gluttony.

During the film, Chet's pathological obsession with his elder son is a constant theme. Not content with copping a feel of his young supple body in full view of the public, and then trying to reassure him with the unconvincing line "you're never too old for hugs" (copyright Pee-Wee Herman's playbook?), he later tries to trap him on a rickety old pontoon boat, knowing there's no escape. The clearly terrified Buck's need to be assured that he won't have to fend off Chet's amorous advances seems entirely reasonable given the moonlight setting.

Having already traumatised his younger son and his twin nieces with the prospect of being mauled by grizzly bears, Chet then decides to ensure that the poor mites will end up as psychiatric basket cases by deliberating tormenting a bear and provoking it into attacking their car. Recklessly endangering the kids' lives in order to bolster his own sense of masculinity ought to have alerted even the least pereceptive passer-by to his malign nature.

They say a fool and his money are easily parted and Chet duly proves the adage correct by handing over his life's savings on the basis of one risible cock and bull story spun by his brother in law. It must be truly gratifying for his family to know that he'd sacrifice their future prosperity to a transparent con man like Roman so readily. It would have been better for them in the long run had Roman never come clean, at least a valuable life lesson might have been learned.

Chet really has something against bears. One poor bear in particular has been the non-stop target of his vicious bullying. After hauling the hapless animal out of the comfort of its home, the unarmed Chet eschews the possibility of finally engaging in a fair fight with the creature by running off screaming like an hysterical schoolgirl. Notice that when Roman and the twins are in danger, he takes an eternity to get to the garage and back but when his own skin is on the line, he moves faster than Usain Bolt with a case of the trots. What is worse, he leads the bear straight back to the cabin thus putting everyone else in harm's way for the umpteenth time.

Not content with this, he discards the possibility of giving his poor victim a dignified death and instead, shoots the bear in its rear end thus condeming it to a long, tortuous demise. A more heinous act of cruelty has probably never been seen outside of a KFC factory.

That's all I can think of for now bu there is no doubt plenty of other evidence that could be added to this. Next time you are debating movie villians, remember there is one character that leaves Hannibal Lecter, Max Cady and the rest for dead. Try throwing out the name Chet Ripley. The arguments are legion.

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You got all that from an 80's comedy? Wow. Good rant though.

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That's all I can think of for now but there is no doubt plenty of other evidence that could be added to this.



No doubt at all, because you left off a bunch of stuff.

-he caused all the men in the family to be attacked by leeches.

-he gorged on hot dogs, no doubt still pouting over Roman's gracious gift of the lobster tails the previous evening when he would have just as soon eaten lips and ***holes

-he forced a claustrophobic Roman into the mine shaft, instead of going himself

-he ruined Buck's date and held the whole family captive while pigging down on the old 96er

-he ordered the little girls to kiss a dead man

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LMAO!

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do you really feel that way or is it just an attempt at humor? i ask in all seriousness.

"He must've thought it was white boy day. It ain't white boy day, is it?"

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I can't answer for the OP's intent, but I thought it was funny and my response wasn't serious. I'd much rather have Chet in my family than Roman.

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for sure! was just curious as to the op's intent.

"He must've thought it was white boy day. It ain't white boy day, is it?"

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What are you....a psych student? Provide a case file on Roman then. I'd love to her that.

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Chet is an evil, evil man


Yeah, but that Roman Craig is one crooked son of a bitch.

Okay, well... filibuster.

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That was awesome! And kinda true.

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I have no idea if the OP actually meant what he said or not, but regardless, his post was hilarious! Almost as funny as the actual movie! I want him to review MR SMITH GOES TO WASHINGTON so he can tell us all what a horrible, evil monster Jefferson Smith actually is.

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The OP's post is the funniest thing I've read in ages. ;)

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The original poster is just another critical person who takes something meant to be funny and turn it into something serious. Basically, he's making something into something that it's not.

Next time you condem a guy who takes on a bear that's aggressive and attacking your family and you have to shoot it in defense, you let me know if PETA is barking "animal cruelty" at you. I'd shoot the bear if my life was in mortal danger, or my family. Where I come from that animal rights stuff goes flying out the window when the animal puts me in danger. Samething with shark or croc/gator attacks; would you just sit there and let the beast eat you alive?

Like what a previous poster said that he'd perfer a Chet Ripley in his life over a Roman Craig. I tend to agree with that too. Chet was more of a family man, while Roman was snobby, obnoxious, took advantage of people, pretended to be something he wasn't (rich and successful), a liar (that story of the bathroom at the wedding was made up) and just suck the fun out of Chet's vacation. On top of that, Roman shacks up with Chet's family once they get back to Chicago since he's now no longer considered a wealthy successful businessman, but a lying loser who can't even hold his own.

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Take it easy... Pretty sure the original post was just a well-crafted joke.

The only thing I have a problem with is that was not a pontoon boat that Chet tried to seduce his own son on.

It was a row boat.

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This thread reminds me of the famous "Villainous Grandpa Joe" post on the Willy Wonka board.

The Falcon flies

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