That's it! I'm outa here with the rest of you scrubs!

I started frequenting the IMDb Sports board just prior to the 2014 season, primarily to do battle with Patriots haters. It was a better time for the haters back then. The Patriots were showing signs of decline* and the GOAT argument was still up for grabs. It was a target rich environment.

2014 was fun. The Patriots started off shaky but then regained their footing. The season concluded with a spectacular Super Bowl victory over the same team that had decimated Peyton Manning the season before. The Patriots were back on top! ... and it became increasingly difficult to avoid labeling Tom Brady the greatest ever.

Deflategate was an amusing summer distraction. It wasn't all that amusing at first when incorrect information was intentionally leaked to the press by unscrupulous elements within the NFL, fueling a firestorm over supposed football "tampering". Embittered by the Patriots newest World Championship, the haters went full retard over what turned out to be a perfectly predictable decline in air pressure due to natural causes. By the end of 2015, many haters had quietly abandoned the Deflategate angle, though a few knuckleheads have not been able to turn off their full retard, even to this day.

2015 started like gangbusters. The haters were crapping themselves throughout much of the season as the Patriots went 10-0, destroying their predictions about how Brady's performance would suffer with "properly inflated footballs". The GOAT had one of his best seasons ever. Unfortunately, the Patriots fizzled in the end, losing the AFC title game to the eventual Super Bowl champs. Peyton Manning happened to be on the field the day the Broncos won the Super Bowl. Despite being one of the worst QBs in the league and having one of the worse Super Bowl performances by a QB ever, he still got a ring. Earnest attempts to reinsert him into the GOAT conversation were pure comedy gold. For some, full retard was a runaway train and there was no stopping it.

Prior to the 2016 season, Deflategate was still lingering on as a power struggle between Goodell and the players union. By this point, the NFL's "science" had been thoroughly debunked and the same sports writers who had been duped by the early NFL's leaks were now calling for the Patriots draft picks to be reinstated. The evidence mattered not. Tom Brady was still suspended for four games of the 2016 season. Full retard went into overdrive when some people tried to argue that the suspension was affirmation that Brady had "cheated" ... despite the court ruling specifically stating otherwise.

Turns out, the four game suspension mattered not. Patriots haters had another miserable year. The Patriots steamrolled to a 14-2 season, the best record in the league. Tom Brady was lights out, again ... and then ... the historic comeback in Super Bowl LI. Oh man, was that the greatest thing ever?!

I kinda feel sorry for the haters. The last three years must have been pretty tough. They were so hoping the Patriots would lose Super Bowl XLIX to another fluke catch, only to have their premature celebrations snatched away by the interception. They had such high hopes that Brady's legacy would be tarnished by a tiny reduction in football pressure and a ball boy's 90 second bathroom break. That blew up it their face. And the coup de grâce ... down by 25 points ... 17 minutes left ... the haters smug satisfaction of a Peyton-esque Super Bowl defeat for the Patriots ... and then Tom Brady, the legend, went to work. The rest is history.

That's it! I'm outa here with the rest of you scrubs!

Patriots haters, try not to emasculate yourselves too much next season when the Patriots go for #6.

Peace.


* Relatively speaking. Most teams decline by not making the playoffs. The Patriots "decline" by not winning Super Bowls.

Why does a rough and tumble sport of men have such whiny pantywaists for fans?