When shall I get into a relationship and get married?
I'm 35 now but I don't know when. Thanks. :)
shareHave you ever had a girlfriend?
share
MovieChat Forums > General Discussion > When shall I get into a relationship and...
I can’t read tea leaves lol but if you have a decent job, a vehicle, are fairly well groomed and pleasant I’d bet you’ll meet a sweet Lady sooner or later. Be sure to be out and about town everyday and DON’T come on too strong!
Also, and this is very important and perhaps counterintuitive but put the matter completely out of mind and just be yourself, having fun at the library, the shops or wherever.
Most couples I know met by pure chance, lightning just struck out of nowhere when they least expected it. None of them met at fancy night clubs or dusty taverns.
20 years ago my cousin Mary made me Godfather of her first born and even though I dislike a lot of things about church my arm was twisted so I showed up…I married a Lady who I had no expectation of seeing at that ceremony, I’ve never chased another Lady since.
Take good care of yourself and the family, be the kind fellow in the neighborhood, toss a joke here and there and earn money, you’ll need money to bring your fine Lady around the city to nice places.
15 more years and your sperm quality declines significantly. better get cracking if you want kids. plus, want to be in a walker at high school graduation?
shareFair enough mate, you know your stuff and this must be a very serious err matter too, right? Cheers.
shareAlso, what's a "walker" at high school graduation?
shareHe’s saying you don’t want to be an old man using a cane or walker at your child’s high school graduation.
shareAh, I see, but I am pretty sure that before I am in my 80s I will definitely be married. :)
sharebut your kids age slow - over 18 year period - so your activity and health will decline with your age, you won't be able to play ball or rough house with your teenage son... and might need a "walker" or wheel chair at high school graduation, where as the other dads are much younger and active
it's a "life time" trad off question: where do you want to be, and when?
Just a comment on my oft repeated point that state-sponsored same-sex marriage is an attempt to get homosexuals on the monogamous treadmill of sexual exclusivity. It's government legislated morality.
The OP and everyone on the thread agrees that this 35-year-ol man must marry and marry soon. Society expects heterosexuals to marry.
When the state sponsors an institution, it does not do so neutrally. It is promoting it, and not for some by choice, but for all by expectation.
You might have a point here but I wasn't thinking this deep and this officially, and yes I wondered about it as myself in simple sense. :)
"It is promoting it"
And that's a "bad" thing necessarily? Also, do you mean, perhaps, its FORCING it?
And its got nothing to do with governments and whatnot, keep in mind I am 35 and soon to be 36 and still live with parents. Many marry far sooner and it is in many ways a personal advantage.
shareYep, governments and governing institutions are nearly always wrong, in here also, lol. :) :) :)
shareDo you pitch in for bills, food, etc?
shareTIME is pushing it, no one else.
Women lose a lot of fertility after 35 - thus, they won't be seeking mates after that (much, or acting desperate), and the younger ones won't want you.
You don't HAVE TO have kids, but it is an instinct in about 95% of all women on Earth.
Women don't wait. If you are not it, they move on. Not time with the clock ticking.
You clock ticks too, but most men don't really care too much about it -- UNLESS you really want to have kids, a legacy to carry on.
TIME is the push.
It's good to promote marriage for heterosexuals like you. As has been said, you probably want kids and to raise a family and be stable. My point is that gay people don't naturally reproduce. I see no point why we should get married or that the government should sponsor the idea.
shareI think it’s only fair that you gay guys get to experience the same abject misery that us straight married guys feel, lol.
shareI meant no offense to the gay community, I have no fighter in that ring.
I had just always taken TheMan as a straight Russian guy living in London looking for a Lady. Perhaps I made an assumption and that CAN get you in trouble, fair point.
As to marriage I think it’s quite a positive arrangement, you find a great partner (gay, straight, etc…) and you meet at the church or temple or wherever you choose. You say ‘the words’ in front of the families, the community and God and now your bodies, lives and wealth are intertwined until death.
It’s all a bit of a business arrangement but business is good.
I think marriage adds an extra shield of stability to society. We need families to be together, kids without fathers and lawyers with fat wallets are bad for the entire operation.
No worries, haha, and yes I am that, a Russian living in UK etc. :)
shareOh, let me clarify. I'm not saying TheMan THEMAN! is gay. I always assumed he's straight.
I'm saying as a gay man myself, when I oppose gay marriage, I do so because I see it as the state's social engineering in my community.
Proponents of gay marriage say it's a choice. But is marriage really a choice for straight people? There is a huge amount of social expectation that straight men marry. And straight women? Lol. We all know damn well they must marry or be socially ostracized.
Haha, don't worry, and yes I am a straight man, haha. :)
shareWell stated, I respect your opinion on the matter.
I do believe that any two people that love each other and want to go to their somewhat annoying job everyday to support each other and keep a stable home betters our societies. There’s stability there in that marriage arrangement…a lot of money is involved too.
I don’t care if they are straight, gay, bi or whatever…
The CONTRACT of marriage is a sacred thing with a fair bit of business involved, a marriage must be tended, fed and watered like a garden bed or it all turns to mush.
I respect that you dislike gay marriage because you presented an honest point of view. I’m uncertain if I agree but you laid out a proper argument, thanks.
Also, is marriage, and/or even a relationship for that matter, a RESPONSIBILITY?
shareYes, yes it is.
When your woman get home from work you meet her at the car to carry her bags, you open the door for her, you oil the squeaky hinge before she has to ask you a second time, you empty all of the kitchen and bathroom waste baskets before she even asks…You’ll be mowing grass and raking leaves half the year and killing mice and big spiders in the house as well.
It’s honest work…but it pays off😄
In 23 days.
shareIn my life its more like 23 YEARS mate haha. Also, can I let go of failed past moments including internet ones? Lol.
shareAlso, I am not into being a father yet, and to be honest, I still feel like I want to continue watching films and whatnot and currently can't set my mind on any relationships as such. :)
share"...and currently can't set my mind on any relationships as such."
So the whole point of this thread was for you to get to say that?? I think I will finally join AndyKing on the other side of that button.
Not really. I did say that yes and the whole point though wasn't it. What's he even got to do with anything in here? He's probably been married for decades and has a family already.
Plus, its just my perception and how I feel at the moment. Who says I may not change my mind in some months time, maybe in 3 years some changes will come, who knows?
Me and receiving help online in last many years have been always strangers haha. :) Lol. :)
shareTold ya 😤
shareAnd folks, as perfectly welcome as you all are of course, this thread is indeed about myself and if I should marry and what to be like in this field. Not so much, American or otherwise, societal and governmental stances on marriage in general. :)
shareNOT TO MENTION, with how most people KNOW me here as a USER, would a guy like me even be ABLE to withstand and get into a RELATIONSHIP with someone and then MARRY them and start family etc, point being, am I ready? (Haha, I can almost hear some say - nah mate, give it a few years, lol.)
Maybe I want a particularly attractive young lady. One that will share my interests here and there. Lol. But I am too SHY to make any first moves here, lol. :)