Life doesn't always allow us to talk about things that bother us.

Including, as in my case, not so much PERSONALLY, as in, I may not have even experienced any of that stuff myself, but maybe, I saw something in a movie, I've heard my grandmother say something in a very strict and authoritarian manner, I've heard relatives say something and others - besides, some of those people were even very clever and seemed to know the world. I may NOT be stupid etc, but I can be and often am, naive, shy, very inexperienced, into more form than content, care too much about myself and often indulge in wishful thinking. Latter one does NOT always help in the real world but we can't help it.

Also, online and elsewhere, people are, and often in their very OWN and very direct and blunt way, quite sensitive. And it also means in certain cases, they can tell you off big time without trying to help you or explain, even if you don't mean no offense.

I also do agree with a lot of things in life yes. But sometimes, I have what's called an extra desire for curiosity, satisfying narrative, virginal knowledge, I may even see including in cinema all wrong doing as the same (so please don't, for example, get more worked up over the discussion of "one issue" as you would with say "murder") or even look at double standards at least in theory, including if a villain or antagonist or whatever also happened to be an attractive female and not the massive COMMON examples of male perpetrators or other examples that we have ALREADY gotten used to. And hence, I felt compelled to TALK ABOUT IT, even if to dismay of other people. Also, I had some people react DIFFERENTLY than expected and not too sure themselves, or willing to talk. And this SITUATION made me feel frustrated and empty at times and at others even to wallow in self pity and get angry overall on the order of - "You don't have to be so damn judgmental people". And maybe don't mention a certain word or a typical approach again for my OWN CONVENIENCE, to avoid EMBARASSMENT and to counteract cognitive dissonance.

Also, I dare say, I was never much of a book reader or a studier. And I got bored a lot with things in life and emotional on the other. Sometimes I didn't even ask if things are right and wrong etc but wondered how to get over them in the name of relief, catharsis and especially OPTIMISM.

Even as a guy I never got into a lot of things. Including a relationship with someone. And again, sorry if both here and elsewhere I was a nuisance, at times unsettling and demanding, in some cases, I was like in a mysterious trance-like mode of neutrality where I imagined life is almost like a movie. Lost Highway meets Knock Knock, that's me, and other examples I simply moved aside so as not to be personally burdened by them.

But its not a complaint. And life and internet isn't a place for exhausted in and by life guys like me who like to theorize and wonder and even look for a relief from it all like that. Yeah, now haha I get it all. And Popcorn Kernell, sslg, guys from those and other sites etc, I am sure they DO get me. Plus, I sometimes was vague and ambiguous too, again, for my OWN good, and I often had what's called a unique and MORBID fascination with certain things, given how I often felt the aura of their surroundings as well, beyond facts too, but hopefully within RESPECTABLE BOUNDARIES, and certainly NOT to do anything wrong in life myself including for main reasons of despising perpetrators and having main empathy and whatnot, especially in traditional well known examples. But alright now. :)