Please help!!


There is a guy I work with that is constantly accusing me of things I did not do and is telling on me to my boss. I am completely shocked when I talk to my boss at work when she asks me about it. I just look at her and I tell her I did not do those things my coworker accused me of; he is always constantly targeting me. How should I deal with this??

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This is actually a serious legal matter, and there are better options than looking for advice from an internet chat group. Enriquesingh gave some good advice. If you work in a large company going to HR makes sense. In a small family company, I have seen them close ranks to protect the family member. However, there are legal protections in the workplace. If this is adversely affecting you, and it sounds like it is, it may be worth consulting an employment lawyer. If you are in a hostile work environment and they don’t protect you, it may mean a lot more than just unemployment benefits.

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I addition to the advice already given, the most important thing is to keep all your record keeping absolutely factual and try not to let emotion cloud your judgement. If you can prove beyond all reasonable doubt that you were in a particular place, at a particular time, performing a particular task that completely refutes the accusation, then he loses all credibility. Good luck!

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You could do like "MovieBuff224" and simply punch him in the face! 😲

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Duct tape a fish inside his hubcap.

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In addition to the other things mentioned here, I'd add one more. NEVER let yourself be in a situation where it's only your word against his. Don't be in a room, an elevator, or anywhere else alone with him.

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That's an excellent point. Thank you!

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You're welcome. I'm just passing on advice an attorney gave me, thirty years ago, when I was in a similar situation. A woman at my workplace was spreading malicious gossip about me.

Bullies are often cowards, and that was true in my case. The moment I let her and my employer know that I had hired an attorney and we were preparing a lawsuit against her for slander, she clammed up and never tried anything against me again. A few months after. she quit for another job.

I didn't pursue the lawsuit. I was fortunate in that the whole office knew her to be an immature flake with a vindictive streak. I hadn't been harmed by her lies and she had been more or less publicly humiliated, so I figured it wasn't worth the trouble. But I did learn something from the incident. Most of the time, having congenial relationships with people is the way to go. But there are times when one has to make a choice between being liked and being feared, and sometimes being feared is the better choice.

Others have mentioned keeping records. I kept a detailed diary of everything that happened at work. Not just the events involving her, but everything, including who was present, what time something happened, etc. Quick notes during the work day which I'd type up into a full description each evening. That way, for example, if she tried to claim that I had done something at a particular time, I could name people who could state I could not have done that because at that time I was with them.

Anyway, I hope things work out for you.

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Thank you so much. I'm sorry that happen to you at your work. I'm glad that employee quit; I bet you were happy about that. :)

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Who can say if you are not going to give any details? Why would you come here for advice?

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Too bad Hitler isn’t around to give his advice on the situation.

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Oh there you are Adolph.

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Nothing wrong with asking for advice. Certainly better than complaining about pages that are trending that hurt your delicate feelings.

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Every time he harasses you whip out your phone or a pad and pen and write down every single thing he says. Or better yet, video it if you have the chutzpah. While doing so say” uh huh, yes, .. and.. anything else?”

Email HR and ask what the policies on harassment are. When they ask why, be your usual shy self and say something like: “never mind, it’s ok.” They’ll pressure you into talking and you can then spill the beans.

Record all of this. Communicate in emails and keep them. Take notes immediately after any in person meetings. If HR harasses you like corporate bullies do when workers enforce their rights, you can then seek legal counsel and sue the shit out of them.

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