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Gender Reveal Parties


Does anyone else hate them as much as I do? How overplayed / annoying have these things become with couples trying to one up each other?

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I don't get the point behind it, and it causes problems when people wanta buy presents for your baby shower. Of course, the same problems could ensue if you want to wait until the baby is born and be surprised, because even then, your friends and family aren't gonna know what to get you, save for universal baby stuff.

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never heard of this.

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It's just a good excuse to spend time with family and have a party. It might be a reaction from being sour about baby showers.

~~/o/

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I am 100% in support of gender reveal parties. They're a clever way of pushing back against trans activism, which years ago started using social engineering to manipulate, bully and brainwash everyone into subscribing to their cracked notions of gender. For example, parents were suddenly being told they were evil for wanting to raise their girls to like pink, glitter and Barbie or wanting to raise their boys to like blue, action figures and cars. They had enough clout to the point of successfully bullying Target into no longer having a boys and girls section, to make it that much harder for parents to raise their children according to gender norms:

Target Removes Gender-Based Signs In Kids' Sections & Impressed Twitter Users Are Celebrating
https://www.bustle.com/articles/103030-target-removes-gender-based-signs-in-kids-sections-impressed-twitter-users-are-celebrating

Parents could've just said, "Fuck you," but they pushed back in a clever way. They used gender reveal parties to reaffirm their right to celebrate the excitement of having and raising a gendered child. Guests who otherwise don't really care about gender become part of the excitement, and participate in the reaffirmation by being encouraged to bring gifts according to gender.

You can tell how brilliant this strategy was, because the lamestream media has started sensationalizing these parties by focusing on a few tragedies. The reason why is that the lamestream media, which is pro-trans, realized how subversive the gender reveal party is, so is now going down this pathetic route of pretending these parties are prone to disaster and therefore foolish and a form of karma for the people holding these parties.

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I do appreciate your info. No doubt you have given me a lot to think about, especially regarding the nature of gender neutrality, but consider the following.

There was a time when boys wore pink and girls were the ones who dressed in blue. At a young age, children would be pampered in clothes that would be easy to get in and out of, having nothing to do with boy/girl stuff. "Every generation brings a new definition of masculinity and femininity that manifests itself in children’s dress", says Smithsonian.

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/when-did-girls-start-wearing-pink-1370097/

Below in the same article, check out the picture of a young FDR, a respected leader of the United States by many. He does look very effeminate by our standards today but that wasn't the case more than 100 years ago. U.S. marketers used to sell all children's toys together, only splitting them into boy/girl categories when they discovered that doing so led to increased toy sales.

~~/o/

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I read that Smithsonian article, and like most veiled apologia for trans activism, it's filled with a lot of disinformation. For example, FDR wasn't wearing a "gender-neutral hairstyle". He was wearing a boy's hairstyle called The Little Lord Fauntleroy, based on the book of the same name. The main character was a boy who was dressed like a caricature of old-fashioned nobility (large frilly collar, straight bangs and long curls). When the book came out, it was so popular that it became a fad for the upper middle class to dress and style their sons in this dandy style, kind of like how in the 1960s, it was popular for young boys to grow their hair like The Beatles and wear Peter Pan collars.

Original Little Lord Fauntleroy character (note hair, with straight bangs and shoulder length curls):
https://render.fineartamerica.com/images/rendered/medium/canvas-print/mirror/break/images-medium-5/little-lord-fauntleroy-written-mary-evans-picture-library-canvas-print.jpg
FDR picture as a baby (note hair; it's exactly the same): https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/enhanced/webdr05/2013/6/17/12/enhanced-buzz-22533-1371487271-21.jpg

We know this was nothing more than a fad, because look at how boys were dressed a decade or two later:

Herbert Hoover-https://i.pinimg.com/originals/20/c1/85/20c1856faada8c9fb1135c419b880fa0.jpg
Theodore Roosevelt, 1862-http://blushingrosetoo.blogspot.com/2010/05/theodore-roosevelt-on-being-american.html

Another thing--FDR wasn't wearing a "dress", nor was his outfit considered "gender-neutral." He was wearing a baby's gown, which were unisex, like how nightgowns back in the day were unisex: https://i.pinimg.com/736x/b1/54/6a/b1546aa0b44d834a7249198dde92f660--s-fashion-mens-fashion.jpg. It makes sense that babies wore unisex gowns, because until the 19th century, the tradition was to put kids in miniature version of adult fashions. With babies growing so fast, it was much easier to put them in these gowns than keep making tailor made outfits every few weeks.

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Just continuing where I left off, because MC has a character limit.

Again, regarding The Smithsonian article, it's filled with disinformation. For example:

So the baby boomers were raised in gender-specific clothing. Boys dressed like their fathers, girls like their mothers. Girls had to wear dresses to school, though unadorned styles and tomboy play clothes were acceptable.


What the author is saying isn't true; it was only true of periods before the Victorian era.

Tudor: http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-lW7tKHyuHa4/UrM-wxw0ugI/AAAAAAAAFJY/ovmJLRD9eUI/s1600/children2.jpg
Baroque: https://i.pinimg.com/236x/48/4b/b4/484bb448e794c41a06285bf0b6ee6da1.jpg
18th Century: https://i.pinimg.com/originals/e3/f2/40/e3f2402f18f655405b39acdbd3bc790c.jpg

It was only in the 19th century when adults stopped dressing kids like little adults and designed so-called "kidswear". Afterwards, kids didn't dress like their parents at all, especially Boomers. For example, here is a picture of what they wore in the 1940s: https://i.pinimg.com/originals/5c/8e/61/5c8e615e2c6fd5077904603adb2af432.jpg. Did mothers wear skirts exposing their knees? Fathers? No. They had their own kidwear.

Regarding the whole blue/pink debate, this is a thing that trans activists like to argue--"rules were different in the past, so the rules don't matter." This is like when people argue that morality was different 100 years ago, so is therefore invalid as a concept. The fact that we picked pink=girl, boy=blue doesn't negate the fact that gender norms have always existed, any more than the fact that it was acceptable to execute people for public amusement 300 years ago means that morality is invalid.

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This is really fascinating and you provide some very strong intellectual points. I was just highlighting the fact that gender norms are in a constant flux of change since it is a social construct, a created concept, unlike the biological reality of the sex we are born into.

Your trans argument is interesting but I feel like it is a bit of a stretch. All parents are expected to rear their children, shape them with their values and beliefs. Trans identity, even if it is a byproduct of our current time and culture or something longstanding, focusing on its prevalence is inconsequential given how numerically small it is in the human population.

I think the criticisms of gender reveal parties have more to do with it being the new cool kid in town syndrome, meaning, it's no more dangerous than any other special occasion if we were to remove any explosive activities from the celebrations. It stands out because it is different.

You are very bright and sophisticated, able to analyze and articulate finer detail. However, when having a conversation with someone, do not assume what the other person will say, or else you run the risk of rubbing them the wrong way when not intended. This is simply my observation of you, backed by my own personal experience of trying to talk to people as practical as possible, attempting not to come off a smarty pants while still displaying great merit. Generously researched info deserves friendly and constructive feedback.

~~/o/

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An interesting take, but I strongly doubt most of the parents who engage in this silly fad are doing so as a conscious anti-trans statement. I believe they are doing it for presents and because women like to throw parties for the flimsiest of reasons. Don't try to tell me that fathers are sitting there planning a ridiculous party with extra enthusiasm because "boy won't this teach those trans activists to push their gender fluidity nonsense on us, wait till they see how this pink balloon pops!". That's just silly.

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I never said they subconsciously did it. Why assume that I did? Or play obtuse about the fact that many times throughout history, when people feel pressured by society, they come up with strategies of dealing with that pressure without really understanding the mechanism behind it?

For example, the counterculture of the 1960s didn't happen because a bunch of people sat down with their thinking caps and went, "Boy, the 1950s were oh, so stifling, conformist and soul crushing. Let's create hippies and the free love movement." No. It arose as an instinctive response to the 1950s, without people really knowing or understanding why all of a sudden, they wanted to wear their hair long and do drugs or discover themselves in Tibet.

Ditto, punk. Did punk arise as a subconscious response to neoliberalism aka corporate fascism? No. It just happened.

It's the same with this gender reveal party trend. If it's just nothing more than a harmless affair, why is the mainstream media working so hard to ridicule and even rant that they "need to end"? Some examples:

Business Insider: A grandmother died during a gender reveal party. It’s time to end these rituals permanently.
https://www.businessinsider.com/grandma-died-at-gender-reveal-party-can-we-end-them-2019-11

The Atlantic: How Many People Have to Die Before We’re Done With Gender Reveals?
https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2019/11/gender-reveal-disasters/601801/

Again, why the histrionics if this is nothing more than a simple affair? Because it's a clever subversion of trans ideology. Trans activists are livid about it, which is why every other week they're coming up with ways to denigrate gender reveal parties and screech that they "need to end."

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Histrionics? Not from me, I just said it was dumb and I stand by that. None of my business if people want gender reveal parties though, I’m too hungover to care today to be honest 🤷‍♂️

Your trans theory is out there, but it’s your opinion and I say run with it atomiclady.

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Histrionics? Not from me, I just said it was dumb and I stand by that.

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I didn't mean you. I meant the media. Look at that headline from The Atlantic--"How many people have to die?" The point I was making is that I don't believe that these gender reveal parties are just harmless affairs. They're very subversive of trans ideology. It's the subversion that is the reason why the media is gunning for them to end.

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weed helped with the counterculture movement of the 1960s

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You're right, of course. But you've just been atomicgirl'd. It's just one of her long, baseless assertions, pitched as fact, but in actuality, just a non sequitur that bubbled up from her own personal views on the issue. Notice how she broadens to history lessons rather than drilling down to anything specific that proves that these particular parties are actually born of a clever strategy, rather than just another example of the current widespread penchant for recording and posting every moment -- manufactured or otherwise. Her examples of criticisms of the practice are laughable as proof. As though people getting angry over such a practice proves that the practice itself was ingeniously devised for the sole purpose of inspiring that anger.

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Ah well, if she can’t tell I come in peace it’s not for me to spend my day convincing her. It takes more than a few sternly delivered opinions to upset or engage me and with all due respect I’m just not engaged in this topic. No hard feelings here amigos.

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You disagreed and challenged the logic of her view with the obvious. That's all it takes.

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Congratulations. You just got played by my cyberstalker (who I just blocked), who goes to every one of my posts, dribbles "editorials" about what I said, and then convinces the person I was talking to that I was arguing with them. I wasn't arguing with you. I wasn't even talking about you when I talked about histrionics.

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Yeah, I "stalked" you by commenting on a post in General Discussion. I guess you "stalked" me last time by commenting on my post in Joker?

https://moviechat.org/tt7286456/Joker/5db47155290b7e61810fa55c/Bronx-resident-throw-eggs-at-tourist-visiting-steps-the-Joker-danced-on?reply=5db6f70cee5209591021df42

It can't be that these areas happen to be popular -- or that you're grossly exaggerating with your "every one of my posts" claim (we've had all of four volleys spread out over months) -- before deciding to ignore by sticking your head in the sand rather than mounting a reality-based defense of all you assert. It just bugs you to see me deconstruct your nonsense. But the other poster had already done that, right? Or did he just "play obtuse" b/c he didn't find any connection to your inane attempts at historical parallels as substitute for proof of a theory so clearly born of a wish?

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Another worthless "drive by comment" from cyber stalker, dmac8, where all he does is dribble, "I agree with the poster atomicgirl disagrees with," and then posts an editorial comment about me.

Welcome to my ignore list.

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For what it’s worth I appreciate your well constructed and detailed response atomicgirl and I had no intention of making the argument personal. I see this happening too often, have been guilty of taking things too personally myself, so it’s something I try to avoid.

I can’t say I’m any sort of trans activist, I just think they are marginalised as a group enough already, effectively blaming them for gender reveal parties seems like kicking someone when they’re already down. Gender politics is all a bit beyond me, it’s a mad world, the only way I can make sense of it is to treat people as individuals and try to ignore the radical voices shouting from both sides.

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I'm not sure how they're becoming such a fad while at the same time gender has become such a dirty word.

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In the same manner I'm not sure how the expression "baby mama" has replaced the grammatically correct, baby's mama and has become fashionable.

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Hey, any excuse for a party!

Just don't assume that anyone outside the immediate family actually gives a rat's ass about your baby's sex, because nobody but the parents do. It's that assumption that makes these dos so annoying, like weddings and baby showers, the assumption that your everyday doings are hugely important to other people, people who have everyday doings of their own.

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Outgrowth of the selfie and look-at-me social media era, I think. Everyone wants attention, hence, everyday events become grandiose productions to garner 'likes' and try to impress others. Notice I said 'try.' 🙄

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I admit, I am old by internet standards, and social media is largely a mystery to me.

Okay, I sort of understand why people want to put bragging and selfies out there... but what I do not understand is why ANYONE else ever looks at other people's bragging and selfies! Is the entire enterprise nothing but people giving each other "likes", in the hope of getting some "likes" for their own selfies?

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It's a symbiosis!

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sounds like another name for a baby shower

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Which was an another name for a baby bath.

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You’d think so but no, it’s in addition to the baby shower. Every day’s a party when you’re pregnant 🙄

Have to say I find the trend to celebrate every little thing in life tiresome, culture has become overly congratulatory. Like participation awards in kids sport. No, you don’t deserve recognition for just turning up you little snot. There are winners and losers, that’s life. Better to learn that early.

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I got kicked out of one because I pulled down my pants. I thought we were supposed to reveal our gender?

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