I'm shocked that in 2019 I still occasionally have people in retail or coworkers use terms like 'love' or 'darl' etc. I'll take 'mate', that's fine, that's normal in Australia.
But when people touch me on my shoulder, or pat me, etc, I think 'why are you touching me?'
Nobody has bumped me off but they have had a couple of good goes at it ! And my personal experience has been that no good deed goes unpunished. But it's nice to hear that your experience has been more positive.
I stress about it for days , but I have gotten much better as I've gotten older. I still think I can detect anyone coming up behind me pretty quick. No one sneaks up on me thats for sure.
I don't know if you are male or female but I feel the same way. I take a lot of calls at work and the amount of women who say "love/sweets/darls" is really pathetic. If I said the same thing to them it would be the end of the world.
I don't appreciate being touched either. I know there is this theory that men should just be happy about female attention but I do not subscribe to that way of thinking.
I saw this show and the guy said 'excuse me sweetheart' and she goes 'sweetheart?' and took offence. It is outdated but there is a bigger double standard.
The girl who called me 'love' the other day was at a supermarket and couldn't have been older than 22. Why is she talking like she's from the 50s or something?
She probably gets it from her parents who got it from their parents. It is just a cultural thing within their family. It's a lazy way of speaking really as it denotes "I don't know your name nor do I want to know it. I will just call you love and everything will be fine". It's similar to how men call each other mate but with that there is actually some camaraderie behind it.
I live deep in the mountains of east Tennessee and people here are generally very friendly. Friendly greetings, handshakes, shoulder touches and terms of endearment are very common, even among strangers. If you're broken down on the side of the road people are quick to stop and help and folks who don't know you personally will wave from their cars, or more likely, their trucks.
Still... people closest to me have hurt me the most and I have to remind myself that these people are just being friendly, don't want to harm me, and that human contact truly is a good thing.
Oxytocin is that good feeling that comes from connecting with another person and that's really all they're after and it's not just for themselves. They're trying to inspire it in you too ;)