Director Yorgos Lanthimos's heroic achievements have been savagely overlooked

Much of the movie's two and a half hour runtime was spent showcasing graphic necrophilia... Up till now, we've all had to make do with kidnapping truck stop hookers, strangling them with extension cords in the basement once we got home, then recreating scenes from The Kama Sutra with these same corpses, whenever we were overwhelmed by a craving to boff the dead

Poor Things will be revered as the landmark film that enabled us to enjoy this particular delicacy vicariously, instead of being forced to rely on DIY efforts